Shattered Pieces
by Squilkey
Summary: Jackson and Isaac's story - From the day they meet, to the moment they find each other again
1. Chapter 1

Jackson was ten when the new neighbours moved in.

He didn't think much of it, people were always coming and going from his neighbourhood, he never thought he'd ever care about one of them, after all, they're just the people you live by, there doesn't have to be any kind of involvement.

These were the exact kind of arguments Jackson tried to give to his parents, but they wouldn't have it, Jackson would have to go over and introduce himself.

And that's how Jackson found himself knocking on the neighbour's front door Saturday afternoon. He stood outside for a few minutes, knocking on the door every thirty seconds. Eventually, Jackson heard noises from inside and then the door cracked open.

"What?" A scratchy voice came from inside.

"Hi, I'm Jackson Whittemore, from next door, my parents wanted me to come and say hi and-" The door was slammed in Jackson's face before he could finish his sentence.

Jackson stood staring at the closed door for a moment before huffing and walking back across the street to his own house.

He slammed the door as he got home.

"What happened, sweetie?" His mother asked, approaching him with a concerned look on her face.

"Nothing," Jackson grumbled, pushing past her to go up the stairs. "I wouldn't go over there though, they're not very friendly."

Jackson was in the front yard of his house, throwing lacrosse balls into the net he had set up. He was already playing for an elementary team, but he was striving to be captain as soon as he got to Beacon Hills High.

Suddenly, there was a loud clatter, throwing Jackson off balance and making him miss his shot. He watched the ball fly past the net and down the street, and cursed under his breath.

He looked to see where the disturbance had come from; of course, the new neighbours.

Jackson wondered if an animal had gotten into their bins, but no, the noise came again, it was from inside the house.

Inside? Jackson wondered, maybe they were playing a game and a few vases were being smashed. Yes, that's what was happening.

Jackson turned back to his practise, grabbing another lacrosse ball from the lawn. But, once again, he was cut short, luckily not losing the ball this time.

He turned back towards the house. Except, there was a kid on the ground, a mop of dirty blond curls, clouded his face. He couldn't have been much younger than Jackson, but he looked about as strong as a pre-schooler. Jackson wanted to ignore it, he really did, but something in his gut wouldn't let him.

"Are you alright?" Jackson called across the street. The kid in question pulled himself up from the ground. His hair went with him as he stood up, and Jackson noticed his face right away, there was a gash across his forehead and blood was running down his face into his right eye.

"M'fine," The boy mumbled, rushing to cover the wound. He immediately realised his mistake as he cried out loud when his hand slammed into the mess of blood, hair, and…glass? Was that what the crashing sounds had been?

"You're obviously not fine, I'll get you a…Band-Aid…or water?" Jackson realised he had no idea how to help a ten year old whose head was profoundly bleeding. Why did he want to help anyway? Neighbours are just people who live next to you, not people you have to be involved with. Still, Jackson felt compelled to help the small, bleeding boy standing across the street.

Jackson waved the boy over, and he came limping across, walking as slow as humanly possible. Jackson threw the stick down, realising he was still holding it, and ran inside to fetch a glass of water. He came stumbling out of the house, handing the glass to the boy, now sitting in the lawn, ripping up grass in tuffs.

"What's your name?" Jackson immediately regretted asking; neighbours, not friends, he felt as if he had to keep reminding himself. But then again, it was just a name, he knew plenty of names he didn't care for.

"Isaac…Lahey," He squeaked out the words, as if he were unsure of his own name.

"Are you sure?" Isaac eyes grew wider and he looked terrified. "I'm joking! Never heard a joke before?" Isaac looked down at his lap, pulling at more grass. "Get up, let me see your head."

"It's fine, really, I've had worse," Isaac still talked in a small voice, barely audible at some times. Worse? Your head looks as if its been stabbed and you're saying you've had worse? Jackson wanted to yell. Instead, he chose the calmer route.

"Uh, yeah, same here…still it wouldn't hurt to, you know…wipe the blood off your face." Isaac stared up at him and Jackson avoided his eyes. What was he saying? The kid didn't want help, he made that perfectly clear, so why did Jackson still offer?

"Sure," Isaac mumbled, pulling himself up and shaking grass blades from his baggy clothes. They walked inside Jackson's house, Isaac falling behind with his limp.

"What's with the limp?" No, don't get involved; Jackson was growing frustrated with his own mouth, why couldn't he shut up? Thankfully, Isaac ignored the question.

"Are your parents not home?"

"Uh, yeah they're out a lot…" Jackson noticed Isaac hadn't touched the water. "Drink it," he motioned to the cup. He went to the sink and wet some paper towels. Isaac snatched them from Jackson's hands, as he didn't want to be handled like a baby.

"I'm not a kid, you know. I'm ten." Isaac said this with a little more confidence in his voice, but Jackson still heard the scared kid.

"Cool, I'm ten too."

They spent the rest of the time in silence, Isaac blotting at the wound with the mess of paper towels, Jackson sitting on the counter, watching. Isaac winced in pain every time the pressure hit right on the gash.

"Um, maybe you should get that looked at…there's glass in there." Jackson wanted to help, so he sat on his hands.

"I have to go," Isaac muttered. He bawled up the paper towels in his fist and then limped out the front door, Jackson just sat, watching.

The scene carried on for a few months, Jackson would hear yells or bangs coming from across the street, Isaac would either end up outside, or the house would get dark and quiet. Jackson always got a weird feeling in his gut when Isaac didn't show up. Eventually, he got accustomed to it. Isaac would come over after Jackson noticing him in his yard. Covered in new cuts or bruises, Jackson wouldn't ask, he didn't want to be too involved. He would always get Isaac a glass of water, but Isaac would never drink it.

One day, during the weekly visit to Jackson's house, Isaac fell asleep on the couch. Jackson grabbed a blanket and threw it over Isaac's small body, shivering in his sleep. Jackson sat on the floor and turned on the TV, careful to keep it as quiet as possible, something told him Isaac never got much sleep.

The next thing Jackson remembered was a loud banging on his front door. He rushed to answer it, noticing Isaac was still asleep. He pulled the door open, and behind it stood a man. His face was contorted into one of fury and rage, it made Jackson shrink back.

"Where is he?" The man spat.

"D-do I know you?" Jackson's voice faltered, he recognised the voice from a year ago when he first knocked on Isaac's door. The man grunted and pushed past Jackson, forcing him to the ground. Jackson stayed where he fell, frozen in shock. Adults weren't supposed to treat kids like that, were they? Sure his gym teacher had been rough, but certainly not like this.

Shouting emerged from the lounge room and Jackson jumped to his feet, but before he could take a step, the man stormed back out into the hall, dragging Isaac by the ear. Isaac was whimpering and Jackson watched in terror as the man dropped him to the ground. He approached Jackson, inches away from his face, eyes lit in flames.

"You didn't see nothin', boy." The words were enough to frighten Jackson for life. The man turned away and pulled Isaac, forcefully, back up and out the door.

As the door slammed after the man, Jackson threw himself to the window. He watched as Isaac was drug across the gravel of the road and thrown into the doorway of the other house. Jackson didn't see him for a year.


	2. Chapter 2

Middle school started and Jackson was excited. He had pushed all of the stuff with Isaac to the back of his mind, as far as it could go. He couldn't help when small thoughts of the curly haired boy popped into his mind, but he fought against it as much as he could.

The new sixth graders were gathered in the gym; here they would be assigned their homeroom. They listed off kids alphabetically, Jackson paid little attention, as he knew it would be a long time before W was reached.

"Isaac Lahey." Jackson's head snapped forward. What? Surely it wasn't…but yes, it was. The blond haired boy walked forward and Jackson's eyes were glued to him. For the rest of the names, Jackson kept an eye on Isaac, he still couldn't decide if he was hallucinating or not. Eventually, Jackson was called; he stepped forward and received his schedule. Room 303 for homeroom, and that's where he reported. He chose a seat next to a boy with dark hair and tan skin. The boy smiled at him.

"Danny," he said, offering a hand. Jackson looked at him quizzically before shaking it.

"Jackson." The door opened and Isaac walked in. Jackson once again glued his eyes on the boy.

"Dude!" Jackson looked back at Danny. "I asked if I could see your schedule, are you alright?" Jackson mumbled he was fine and passed Danny his schedule, looking back at Isaac. "Who is he?" Danny asked.

"What? Who?" Danny pointed at Isaac.

"Blue eyes, blond hair, you've been staring at him since he entered the room."

"Uh, yeah, he's my neighbour…I think." Truthfully, Jackson has no idea if Isaac still lived across the street. Danny gave him a strange look.

"Righttt…" He rolled his eyes and took his schedule back.

"Do we have any classes together?"

"Yeah, maths, science, and this class, obviously." Jackson nodded and then, middle school had begun.

Weeks flew by, but Jackson felt as though they drawled out when he left school. He spent his afternoons in the front yard, convincing himself he was practising lacrosse, but in the back of his mind, he knew he was watching for Isaac.

One night, as Jackson was staring out the window of his bedroom, he saw the man, whom he could only assume was Isaac's father; leave the house with a slam of the door. Jackson watched as he stalked to his car and drove away.

In no time, Jackson had pulled on clothes and was standing in front of the door which had just been slammed. Jackson decided to try the handle before he knocked, no luck. He stood knocking for a while. Where could Isaac be? His father obviously hadn't taken him along for a ride. Jackson knocked again.

"Isaac?" He yelled through the door, nothing. Jackson knew he should just turn around and walk back home, grab a snack, and get to bed, but he couldn't do it.

Jackson walked around the back, and checked every window or door for an entrance on the way around. He ended up circling around the whole house, ending up where he had started.

Jackson sighed and turned around to walk back home when the door opened. He heard the noise and whipped around.

"Isaac? Are you okay?" The door opened fully and Isaac's blue eyes pierced through the dark doorway.

From the look of it, Isaac was in good condition, compared to the normal cuts and bruises that would show after his dad had slammed the front door.

"Why are you here, Jackson?" Isaac stood awkwardly in the doorway, his body blocking Jackson's view of the inside of the house.

"Uh, I wanted to see if you were okay."

"Why do you care?" Isaac ducked his head down, his voice falling as he spoke. Jackson furred his eyebrows, looking away from Isaac.

"I don't know! I just- fine, I'm leaving." Jackson stormed away from the house, refusing to look back. He was trying to do something nice, couldn't Isaac see that? He decided he was done with Isaac; after all he had Danny now. Danny seemed like he could be a good friend.

Jackson decided to once again block Isaac out of his mind. This time it was a little harder, as he saw the boy everyday in homeroom. Jackson kept his thoughts on lacrosse and Danny. Danny seemed to take a liking to him as well, teaching Jackson about computers and coding, which Jackson couldn't have cared less about, but it gave him a motive to teach Danny lacrosse.

Jackson moved all his lacrosse stuff to the back yard, where he was certain Isaac wouldn't show up.

Weeks passed and Danny progressively got better at lacrosse. Jackson beamed at his work in training Danny, and the more they trained, the closer they became. But as close as they got, Jackson still felt as if Danny wasn't enough to replace Isaac.

Danny was amazing, he was great in school, and he knew a lot about computers, he was even good at sports; there was nothing to fix.

Isaac needed to be fixed, and Jackson wanted to take on that job.

Isaac didn't know what to do. He hated how he treated Jackson when he answered the door, but his dad had been clear; no more communication with the neighbours.

But Isaac still had to endure Jackson at school, he noticed Jackson and Danny start to become friends, and a weird feeling stirred in Isaac's stomach every time he saw them together, he didn't know what the feeling was, but it made him feel terrible.

Every day after school, Danny would be across the street. Isaac noticed Jackson had moved everything into his backyard, had he really hurt him that badly?

He saw Jackson less and less, and the moments he did see Jackson, he was with Danny. What was so great about Danny? Sure he got perfect grades and was great at sports, but he couldn't be that interesting.

But Isaac couldn't blame Jackson; Danny was way better than Isaac had ever been to Jackson and Danny obviously didn't have crazy issues like Isaac did. Maybe Isaac was just too complicated to be involved in Jackson's life.

Isaac tried to convince himself that Jackson didn't care about him, but then why did Jackson show up at Isaac's door a couple weeks ago? Was it a coincidence Jackson happened to show up while Isaac's dad had gone storming off, or was Jackson watching the house? Isaac secretly hoped it was the latter.

Sixth grade came and went, and soon enough, it was summer. Isaac quickly put together that if Jackson wasn't at home, he was at Danny's, and vice versa.

All summer Isaac waited for a moment when Jackson would be alone, but it seemed as if Danny now lived at Jackson's house. Isaac figured it was probably because Jackson's parents were never home, seriously, what did they do for a living?

Mid-July was when the man showed up. It was a regular evening for Isaac, he sat on the couch, watching TV and trying to stay out of his dad's way. The doorbell started buzzing, Isaac ignored it like normal, 'It could be someone for your father, never answer the door,' Isaac recited in his head.

The buzz rang out for almost a minute until Isaac's father finally answered. Isaac muted the TV and sat up on the couch, straining to listen. There was silence for a moment as he head his dad open the door.

"Lahey?" Isaac heard a gruff man's voice.

"Yeah, that's me, what do you want?" Isaac recognised the tone in his fathers voice, it wasn't inviting. Isaac struggled to hear what the man outside the house was saying; he made out a few words, "Lahey. Combat. Hours. Duty. Arrangements." All of a sudden, his dad was yelling.

"What are you talking about? No. No!" His father repeated his yells louder and louder, and Isaac shrank into the folds of the couch. Whatever it was that set his dad off, it would surely be taken out on Isaac.

Eventually, the screaming died down. Was it his imagination, or was his dad…crying? Isaac became intrigued, he couldn't remember a time in his life when he had heard- much less seen- his father cry. Before Isaac could make it to the door, he heard the front door slam. His father had left him alone? Or was he keeping Isaac from the conversation?

Isaac slipped out of the lounge room and into the hallway. He cracked the door open, surprised to see, not his father, but a tall buff man standing behind it.

Isaac looked up with his piercing blue eyes, and the man looked down at him.

"Isaac Lahey?" His voice was strong and powerful. Isaac nodded, unable to muster a reply. "I assume you have heard most of the commotion between your father and myself?" The man waited for Isaac to reply, but Isaac simply blinked at the man. "No? Well then, it is with my condolences to inform you that Camden Lahey has died in combat." Isaac froze, the man's lips kept moving but Isaac heard no sound.

Surely the man was mistaken, his brother couldn't- not his brother. Isaac started to shake. He needed to get away. The room felt as if it were closing in on him, he was trapped between the huge man and the door. Isaac came to and pushed past the man, ducking under his huge biceps and bolting across the street.

Isaac didn't realise he had a plan of destination until he arrived. Sliding down the closed door of Jackson's house, he pulled his knees up to his chest and started to cry.

Isaac cried for a solid ten minutes with no interruption, he hoped Jackson had been spending the day at Danny's, he didn't want anyone to see him in this state. But then, why would he run to Jackson's if he didn't want Jackson to see him? For the life of him, he couldn't figure himself out.

When Isaac came to, he was in a bed. Blankets pulled up to his chin, and a heating pad pressed against his forehead. What had happened? He didn't even remember passing out, and where had he ended up?

Isaac's eyes flew open and he sat up straight, knocking Jackson to the side.

"What are you doing?" Isaac yelled. Jackson's face became one of spite.

"I found you passed out in my foyer, shivering to death, I couldn't leave you there, could I?" Isaac noticed a change in Jackson's voice since they last spoke. Before, every word Jackson had spoken to Isaac had been in good manner and delicate, now, the words were tinted with sarcasm and fury.

Isaac looked in the opposite direction of Jackson's glare and shook his head. A tear slipped out of Isaac's pooling eyes and ran down his cheek, Isaac tried to wipe it away, but Jackson caught it.

"What happened, Isaac?" With one tear, Jackson's voice had reverted back to its original delicacy. Isaac started to cry harder and he mentally cursed himself for it, he willed himself to stop. Passing out in Jackson's foyer was embarrassing enough; Isaac didn't want to add sobbing like a little girl to that list.

He felt a towel pressed against his face, wiping away at his tears. What? Jackson was standing above him, his brown hair falling over his eyes.

"Isaac, is it your dad? What did he do to you this time?" Isaac rapidly shook his head, not again would he get in trouble for talking about his father to Jackson.

"What does he do to you? I can see the cuts a bruises, Isaac! I'm not an idiot!" Jackson's voice started to fill with rage, but his hand against Isaac's face stayed light and calm.

Isaac tried to find words, holding back the sobbing as he began to speak.

"My-my brother," Isaac choked out the words. Jackson frowned and Isaac realised he had never mentioned his brother to Jackson before.

"Your brother hits you?" Isaac moaned in frustration, but he couldn't gather the right words to fight back. "No?" Isaac shook his head.

"I get you're upset but you're really giving me nothing to work with, Isaac!" Isaac started to cry again and Jackson left the room, Isaac assumed he was annoyed. But Jackson returned moments later with a glass in his hand. Isaac wiped his eyes and looked at him curiously.

"Water," Jackson explained, shrugging. Isaac took the glass from Jackson's hand and set it down on the bedside table next to him.

"Are you okay to talk now?"

Isaac nodded as he replied, "Yeah." There was an awkward moment of silence before Isaac realised Jackson wanted him to tell the whole story. Isaac recalled what had happened, the man showing up at the door, his father leaving the house, finding out his brother was- gone. Isaac lied slightly and instead of telling Jackson he ran away, he said he couldn't remember anything after the man relaying the news until waking up in Jackson's bed.

Jackson listened in silence as Isaac told his story and fell onto the end of the bed when he was done, his mouth slightly agape.

"Isaac?" Jackson finally broke the silence. Isaac looked Jackson in the eyes to let him know he was listening. "Your dad -um- does he h-hit you?" Jackson felt himself choke on the words.

"Jackson! You can't tell anyone! Please!" Isaac almost fell out of the bed in terror. Jackson flew to his side to help him but Isaac pushed him away. "Please, please!"

"Isaac, it's a crime!"

"It's not like that! The glass thing was an accident! He just-he gets in bad moods sometimes. That was the first time I was really ever hurt- I swear!"

"What about that month you never left your house- the month after your dad _drug_ you out of my house?" Jackson protested.

"He's just strict! He didn't want me talking to you and-"

"Is that why you ignored me the whole year? Because your dad doesn't _like_ me?" Jackson interrupted. Isaac's cheeks flushed pink and he looked down into his lap.

"He told me not to talk to you anymore," Isaac mumbled. Isaac felt Jackson's weight lifted off the bed, but he kept his eyes glued down.

"When did your dad become _strict,_ Isaac?" Jackson's raised voice made Isaac cower to the side.

"I-I don't remember. When we moved here, I guess," Isaac's voice was higher than normal, and he stumbled over his words. Jackson must have picked up on Isaac's fear, because his next question was softer.

"And when did your brother leave?"

"R-right before we moved." Isaac didn't know where these questions were going.

"You don't see the correlation?" Isaac shook his head. "Your brother leaves and then your dad starts to h- I mean he becomes _strict_. Did you ever consider maybe your brother was the one keeping your dad from _being strict_?" Isaac looked at Jackson. He had never though of it in that way before. Of course Camden would protect his little brother, but now he's gone. Isaac started to cry.

"Crap, I'm sorry, Isaac." Jackson kept his distance from Isaac and waited for Isaac to regain himself.

"I feel like an idiot," Isaac muttered, using the bottom of his shirt to dry his eyes. Jackson shook his head.

"Isaac, you can talk to me, trust me, I want to help."

"I don't need _fixing_, Jackson." The words came out more bitter than Isaac had meant them to.

"No, you need a friend. Let me be that, Isaac. Trust me. I know you do a bit because you told me about your brother and your father." Isaac realised Jackson was right, he had trusted him with confidential information without giving a second thought, so maybe in a way, Isaac did trust Jackson.


	3. Chapter 3

Isaac returned to his house after Jackson convinced him to drink the glass of water. His father wasn't home yet, so Isaac returned to his spot on the couch, preparing for the storm ahead when the door would slam again.

Hell arrived just before eleven that night, bringing all its fury with it. Isaac was in his room, light off, curled in a ball, but not asleep.

He could never sleep when his dad was out because he knew his father always came back in a worse mood than he had leaving, and Isaac knew there was no news more upsetting than the discovery of your child's death. Unfortunately, especially for Isaac, Mr Lahey only ever went through the first two stages of grief: isolation and anger. And in Isaac's case, the anger was never let go.

Isaac heard the front door slam and he sprung out of bed, bracing for what may follow. Not three seconds passed before his bedroom door was thrown inside and Mr Lahey was pulling on his son's neck, dragging him into the hall.

"First your mother," he spat, shaking Isaac, "And now, your brother. Is it your job to ruin my life, you little shit?" Isaac felt a tear escape his eye and his father huffed in amusement, dropping Isaac to the floor.

"You," Mr Lahey pointed a finger down at his son, towering over his small body, "You don't get to cry!" Isaac lifted a hand to brush away the tears streaming down his cheeks, but his dad caught his hand on the way, and pulled him up forcefully. Isaac's shoulder popped from the force and he winced in pain, trying to fight back the tears pooling in his eyes.

Before he knew what was happening, his father was pulling him down the stairs to the basement.

"We have a new system now. You do something wrong, you go to time out." Isaac frantically whipped around, but his father caught him by the waist and threw him into a cold, metal container. A freezer?

"You killed my wife and now, you've killed my son. It's time to be punished." The door to the freezer was slammed shut, closing Isaac in to the metal catacomb. Isaac curled into a ball, not bothering to fight back. He knew his father was right he had killed his mother. Camden, he wasn't so sure about, but give it time and surely he'll find a way to have been at fault for his death as well.

Hours passed, maybe even days, Isaac found it steadily beginning to get harder and harder to breathe. He started rationalising his air intake, taking short breaths every minute or two.

The lack of air was now starting to get to his brain, black spots blurred his vision, and Isaac began to frantically push at the door above him, wincing as his shoulder was jerked in an awkward position. He tried kicking, punching, and eventually clawing until his fingers bled, the door wouldn't budge.

Isaac pushed and clawed, eventually, his shoulder became numb, but he continued to fight with the door until he blacked out.

When he regained consciousness, he realised his breathing had become lighter, and the air was no longer constricting him. In the pitch black, he slowly raised his arms up to where the freezer door would be, but his hands kept rising. The door had been opened.

Isaac slowly lifted himself up, taking gulps of air as he regained his composure. Isaac gripped the side of the freezer with his left hand, only to yelp in pain as he tried to pull himself up, the pain in his shoulder had returned.

Isaac made it to the top of the stairs, opening the basement door and peering into the house. Sunlight shone through the windows, and he was momentarily blinded by the light, how long had he been in that freezer?

Isaac wandered around the house in search of his father. After checking every room, he opened the front door. The car was gone.

Isaac tried to think about where his father may have gone. Finally, his brain clicked. He checked the clock in the kitchen, yes, one thirty in the afternoon, it was already Monday.

Isaac rejoiced with the thought of being home for hours before his father would be home, one of the perks of summer. He decided to go to Jackson's.

Not until he was halfway across the street did he realise that Jackson would be at his lacrosse camp. Isaac sighed and turned back towards his own house.

He wasted time until two thirty, when he went to sit outside the front door. Isaac knew the bus would stop on their street at two fifty, but what if Danny got off with Jackson? Or worse, what if Jackson went home with Danny?

Isaac sat in the grass, kicking dirt up with his toes, for twenty minutes. Finally, the bus pulled up down the block. Isaac saw the lights flash, but he couldn't make out the kids piling off.

A couple of kids walked away from Isaac, while a few walked towards him. As kids scattered and disappeared, one was left still walking down the street. One. Isaac smiled into his right shoulder, looking away from the brunette approaching him.

Isaac pulled himself up from the ground, careful to cradle his left arm in his right, to keep from jerking his shoulder, and walked towards Jackson.

"No Danny?" Isaac asked, stopping in front of the taller boy. Jackson slightly frowned.

"What?" Isaac immediately realised what he had said, to Jackson it looked as if Isaac knew Danny was always over, which he would only know if he were watching Jackson, which he was, but Jackson didn't need to know that.

Isaac's cheeks flushed pink and he moved his arms to cover his face, forgetting about his shoulder. But as his left arm moved, it jerked his shoulder and Isaac hissed in pain.

"Isaac? What's wrong?" Jackson's voice went up an octave and his eyes gleamed with worry. Isaac grimaced in pain and shook his head.

"Nothing, my shoulder just hurts a bit," Isaac tried to play it off coolly, but Jackson wasn't biting.

"I think a bit might be an understatement, your face is covered in pain." Covered in pain? Isaac wondered. Can a face be covered in something that couldn't be physical? Isaac was about to come up with a clever retort but then Jackson was pushing on Isaac's back towards the Whittemore's residence.

When they got in the house, Jackson moved Isaac into the lounge room and sat him in a chair right by the entrance to the kitchen.

Jackson left him and momentarily returned with a glass in his hand. He gave the glass to Isaac.

"Seriously, drink it all." What was up with this guy and water? Jackson watched as Isaac downed the whole glass, so maybe he was thirsty. Isaac handed Jackson the empty cup, who then placed it on the ground underneath him.

Jackson grabbed the throw off his couch and handed it took Isaac. Isaac took it uncertainly.

"Use it to bite on, so you don't wreck your teeth." Isaac was about to question him when Jackson interlaced his fingers with Isaac's. Isaac felt his heart beat faster, and his breathing became unnatural. Why was he feeling this way? He was so caught up with the feelings he was having about a boy holding his hand that he almost forgot a boy was actually holding his hand.

"Do you trust me, Isaac?" Isaac looked Jackson in the eyes and let out a long, shaky breath. He nodded. Jackson adjusted his hand in Isaac's once more.

"Seriously, put the thing in your mouth." Isaac did as he was told, but he didn't even know what Jackson was planning on doing. He had just blindly trusted him again, this time not knowing what he trusted the boy with.

Suddenly, Isaac's shoulder was jerked forward in the most uncomfortable position imaginable. His teeth slammed down onto the throw in his mouth, even with it, Isaac was sure he had chipped a few teeth. And then, his shoulder felt better.

He rolled the bone in a circle, testing it out. It was still a little sore, but nothing compared to the pain from earlier.

Isaac opened his eyes and looked at Jackson, giving him a smile, something he was sure Jackson had never seen from him before.

Isaac then felt Jackson's hand being ripped away from his own, apparently Jackson realised their hands were still intertwined. Jackson walked away and Isaac felt his cheeks get warm and his smile died.

"Um, it worked?" Jackson turned around; Isaac could see Jackson's face had also been slightly flushed. Isaac's smile came back.

"Yeah! How did you know to do that?" Isaac asked in amazement.

"Lacrosse," Jackson explained, "It's a heavy contact sport. If you haven't dislocated something while playing, then you're not playing correctly." Jackson laughed, as if he were reminiscing on all the good times when he had been brutally attacked on the field.

"Isaac," Jackson immediately turned solemn, "Was it your dad?"

"No! I mean yes- but it was my fault!"

"It was your fault he dislocated it? I find that hard to believe."

"How did you know it was dislocated?" Isaac tried to change the conversation, but Jackson caught him.

"Isaac, stop."

"I deserved it! I deserved it Jackson! Leave it alone!" Isaac was yelling louder than he thought he could, why couldn't Jackson drop his father?

"Isaac, no eleven year old boy deserves being purposely hurt to this point!" Isaac felt Jackson staring at him, but he refused to look.

"Twelve. I'm twelve." Isaac muttered, having nothing else to retort with. Isaac slightly raised his eyes to look at Jackson; he looked angrier than his dad had. Isaac reflexively jumped backwards when Jackson raised his hand up to Isaac. Jackson caught the movement.

"Did you think I was going to _hit_ you? Isaac, when someone lifts their arm, it's not normal to react like that!" Isaac blinked at Jackson, that's all he could find himself to do. They stared at each other for an eternity.

"Y-your voice, its how my father speaks to me…" Jackson's facial expressions changed from anger to shock, he had realised yelling would only get him further from Isaac.

"Isaac…I didn't- I'm sorry. I'd never hit you, I'd never hurt you, and I need you to know that. You need to trust me, okay?" Isaac stared at him with a blank expression.

"Why?" His voice was monotonous. Jackson sighed and kicked at the carpet.

"I'm adopted." Isaac was confused how this piece of information had anything to do with the whole conversation they were having, but he was happy if they were off the subject of his life. "I didn't find out until I was nine. They let me think for nine years that they were my parents. They lied to me." Jackson let out a shaky breath, as if talking on the subject was angering him. "I didn't have anyone to talk to when I found out, no one I trusted. No one I could just vent all my anger to. I had to deal with it on my own. It's so hard, Isaac. You can't keep all that pain balled up inside you, you'll snap. So talk to me, okay? I'll listen; I'll be the one you can trust. I won't tell, I promise."

Jackson held out his hand and Isaac took it uncertainly and they shook. Maybe Jackson was right, Isaac was too fragile and maybe that's because he couldn't talk to anyone.


	4. Chapter 4

Jackson was happier than he had been in a long time that night. Finally, he could help Isaac.

Although Isaac was finally talking to him, he still liked Danny and he didn't want to end his friendship with him.

That summer, Jackson had to carefully plan his schedule between time with Isaac and time with Danny; he had never worked so hard on planning in his life. He made a whole schedule as to not spend too little time with one friend and too much with another.

Isaac was able to come over a lot more often, with it being summer and his dad working.

They frequently played video games, Jackson trying to give Isaac as much of a handicap he could. They also discovered Isaac wasn't such a poor shot at lacrosse.

And, like always, they had to deal with Isaac's father and the new cuts, bruises, and scrapes Isaac would bring over once a week.

Jackson discovered Isaac hated small, tight spaces during a frightful game of hide and seek and learned, unless Isaac was wearing lacrosse pads and a helmet, to never toss an object at him, even if it only weighed a gram.

Jackson would ask frequently if Danny could hang out with Isaac around, but the answer was always a pushy, irritable 'no'.

Jackson knew it was because Isaac didn't want to run the risk of Danny finding out, but Jackson could always sense a twinge of jealousy in Isaac's voice whenever Danny was brought up.

As any thirteen-year-old would be, Jackson was devastated when summer came to a close. No more staying up until two in the morning chugging energy drinks and eating junk, no more sleeping until eleven, no more hanging out with Isaac.

Jackson had trouble differentiating between being wretched because school was starting again or because Isaac would no longer be able to hang out.

Seventh grade started with a bang. Before first bell, Jackson had already joked around with a couple kids, hoping maybe he could have more than two friends before high school started.

Right off the bat, Jackson was given homework. The first day wasn't supposed to involve pre-algebra homework, was it? Jackson didn't have Danny or Isaac in his homeroom this year, which was a bigger let down than the homework.

Jackson met up with Danny in the cafeteria, complaining about his homework before they were even in rage of each other. Danny nodded along to Jackson's complaints, but he seemed out of it.

"You alright?" Jackson lightly elbowed Danny in the ribs. Danny blinked and looked at his best friend. "Wanna sit outside?" Danny shrugged. Okay, something was up.

They ate in silence for a few minutes, Danny picking, rather than eating. Jackson talked, trying to get Danny interested in _something_.

"Lacrosse try-outs tomorrow!" Jackson looked at Danny, who didn't look up from his pile of mush. "Danny! What is your problem?"

"Nothing, I feel a bit queasy, maybe I'll go to the nurse before fifth period. See you in history?" Jackson raised his eyebrows in suspicion but nodded.

Jackson sat alone after Danny left, wondering what had happened during the twenty-four hour time period they had been apart.

Suddenly, his light was blocked. Jackson looked to the source of the shadow and smiled to see Isaac standing above him.

"Can I?" Isaac motioned to the empty bench across from Jackson.

"Be my guest!" Jackson smiled.

Lunch passed in a blur after Isaac showed up; it was much easier carrying on a conversation with someone who talks back.

Fifth period was science and finally it was history with Danny. Jackson entered the class and looked for his seat. This class slowly filed in the room, all except Danny. The tardy bell rang and still, no Danny. Jackson knew the empty seat was his and it wasn't like his best friend to skip a class. Jackson raised his hand.

"Can I go to the bathroom?" He needed an excuse to find Danny. Unfortunately, his teacher was an anti-bathroom fanatic.

Jackson twitched in his seat for an hour, watching the second hand tick slower than it ever had before.

The bell rang and Jackson shot out of his desk and out the door. He made a beeline straight for the nurse. Jackson almost ran into the door when he approached.

"Danny? Mahealani." The nurse looked at him in confusion. "He came by here earlier? During lunch."

"I'm sorry sweetie, no Danny was here." Jackson turned on his heels and ran in the opposite direction getting a few rude gestures as he bumped into kids in the hallway.

Jackson skipped his next class to search for Danny. After wandering around the halls for a long while, Jackson found him sitting on the bleachers by the sports field.

"What the hell, Danny?" Jackson yelled as he approached. "Why'd you lie to me?" Jackson got to his best friend and climbed to sit down next to him. Danny shrugged. "You're acting like a ten-year-old girl! Get over yourself and just tell me what's up!" Jackson was starting to get fed up with the quiet, shrugging Danny.

Danny looked up; his eyes were red and puffy.

"Jackson, I don't want you to hate me, just go away!"

"Hate you? What are you on, Danny? You couldn't have done anything in a day to make me hate you."

"It's not what I did, it's how you feel." Danny was confusing Jackson to oblivion. Jackson remained silent and Danny took a shaky breath. "This morning, when you were talking to that kid before first bell, at least I know how you feel now." Seriously? Could Danny be less passive?

"Danny, I honestly have no clue what you're going on about! Let's just go back to class, alright?" Jackson tried to grab Danny's arm, but he pulled away. He opened his mouth to order again, but Danny yelled over him.

"I'm gay, Jackson!" Jackson gave him a look of confusion fused with idiocy. He took a second and then the whole conversation clicked into place.

"Jesus Christ, Danny! Is this about the whole queer thing?" Jackson looked at Danny, but he was staring at his shoes.

"I meant queer as in weird, not gay!" He looked back at Danny, who was now looking up at him in curiosity.

"I didn't even know you were listening-I didn't even think I was being that offensive. First day man, I kinda need more friends than you. I get it though, sorry." Danny's face softened and he gave Jackson a weak smile.

"But, I am, Jackson. Gay-I mean." Danny's voice sounded rough, as if he were forcing the words out.

"Yeah, that's not really a surprise, Dan. You wouldn't shut up about Tom Cruise when we went to see Mission: Impossible." Danny loosened up and smiled like he used to. "Hey, and I won't use those words if they like, offend you or something." Jackson held his hand out to Danny and pulled him to his feet.

"That's been on my shoulders for so long, I thought you would hate me- or we wouldn't get to hang out anymore." Danny admitted as they jumped down the bleacher rows. Jackson chuckled and shook his head, lightly pushing his best friend.

"You're my best friend, I don't care if you're attracted to dogs, I'm still gonna wanna play lacrosse with you."

"Ha, you don't have to worry about the dogs, I'm more of a cat person." Jackson smiled, Danny was back.

"Hey, we've only got twenty minutes left," Jackson noticed out loud as he looked at his watch, "Wanna ditch the rest of school and go get something to eat?" Danny hesitated, but agreed, and they raced to the school parking lot.


	5. Chapter 5

Isaac sat in his seventh period class, history. His teacher droned on about some war or dispute one country had with another, but Isaac had more important things to deal with. Didn't the school board yet realise that even if they teach it to kids ten thousand times, they'll forget it after the test?

Isaac almost began to imagine he'd rather be in the freezer than listen to another lecture on the constitution.

The final bell eventually rang and Isaac was the first out of the classroom, hoping he'll get some time to talk to Jackson before he's forced to spend the afternoon locked inside with homework.

Isaac waited outside by the lacrosse field, hoping Jackson would be practising for a bit. But after ten minutes, Isaac accepted the fact Jackson wouldn't be coming, and he trudged home, stopping by whatever means necessary to extend the short ten minutes it took to walk home.

Noticing no car in the driveway overjoyed Isaac, as his dad would be furious to find out he took three times longer than usual to get home.

Isaac glanced across the street to the house across from him. He longed to go over, but he knew his dad could arrive at anytime.

Isaac clambered over the back gate, ripping the trim of his shirt and cursing his dad for not trusting him with a key. The back door was always left wide open. Seriously, this man left the back door open to strays and burglars but didn't trust his own son with a key to the house?

Isaac switched on the television, hoping he could have a few minutes of relaxation before his father got home.

Seventh grade progressed and Isaac started to notice Jackson was neglecting him more and more. It seemed as if Jackson and Danny were now glued to the waist.

Isaac hadn't been to his neighbour's house in over a month because Danny was always there. Isaac was getting fed up with it. Jackson knows he doesn't want to be around Danny, and what happened to the whole 'you can always talk to me' speech? How was Isaac supposed to talk to Jackson about his feelings and his dad if Danny wouldn't leave Jackson's side for more than a class period?

Christmas break arrived and, unlike every other kid in the school, Isaac was not looking forward to the three weeks that lay in front of him. Isaac hasn't talked to Jackson properly in over a month, they barely nodded 'hello' to each other. Maybe Jackson had his reasons, but Isaac was still annoyed with him.

On the final day of school before the holidays, Isaac decided to confront the boy. He figured if it all went to hell, at least he wouldn't see him for a few weeks, and maybe it would all blow over by then. The bell rang and Isaac ran as fast as he could to the other side of the building where he knew Jackson would be. He stood against the wall on the opposite side of the door trying to act casual, which unfortunately for Isaac made him look even more awkward than he already was. Jackson noticed his strange stance immediately.

"Are you okay?" Isaac slipped halfway down the wall when he heard Jackson's voice and struggled to pull himself back up.

"Oh, yeah!" Isaac strained his neck to see if Danny was anywhere in sight, so far he was in the clear. Jackson shrugged and moved to walk away but Isaac grabbed at the cuff of his sleeve. Jackson snapped back, looking annoyed.

"Did-Did I do something?" Isaac stumbled over his words awkwardly, bracing himself against the wall. Jackson looked down at his feet. "What?" Isaac's voice rose to a panic. "I don't-I didn't-Did I?"

"You didn't do anything, Isaac. Don't wet yourself." Jackson's voice had a sharper tone to it than Isaac had heard before, it sounded as if it hurt Jackson to talk to him.

"You haven't spoken to me in a month Jackson…" Jackson blinked at him as if to say, 'so what?'. "I thought we were friends. What happened?" Isaac stared up at Jackson, his blue eyes glassing over. Jackson looked everywhere other than those eyes. Isaac swallowed the lump growing in his throat. He wasn't going to cry, he can't be a baby about this, he should have known being friends with someone like Jackson wouldn't last. Jackson glanced around the halls for a minute, checking around the corner and outside the door, before leaning into Isaac's space. They were so close Isaac breathing hitched.

"I can't talk to you, Isaac." His voice was ten times more gentle than it had been. "I don't know what happened, your dad must have talked to my parents, but my parents said I couldn't be friends with you anymore. I'm sorry." Jackson was gone before Isaac had registered the words.

This was all because of his dad? His dad had destroyed the one relationship in his life he cared about? And for what? To spite him? Isaac was growing angrier and angrier by the second, he fled the school and ran with no particular destination in mind. As he ran, hot tears flooded his eyes, blurring his vision and making it difficult for him to register his surroundings. Isaac eventually collapsed into the dirt beneath his feet. He tucked his knees up to his chin and buried his face, letting the tears fall freely.

Isaac sat wrapped in a ball until the sun started going down. He knew his dad would beat him half dead if he didn't show up before nightfall. Coming back now he would hopefully only get a light beating, and hopefully not the freezer. It took Isaac just under half an hour to get back to his house. He had no idea he had run so far.

Isaac didn't even try the front door, he knew he would be caught immediately. He made the routine trip over the back gate, making sure to tuck his shirt into his jeans first, and made his way around to the back door. Customarily, it was wide open. Isaac took this as a good sign, maybe his father hadn't realised he was gone.


	6. Chapter 6

It was Christmas Eve and every family in Beacon Hills was gathered around together, enjoying each other's company, except one.

Isaac had been kicked out of the house at six for 'being disruptive', he was only watching TV, but that didn't matter to Mr Lahey.

It was nearing eight now, and the harsh December winds were batting at Isaac's small frame, freezing him to the bone. He sat in a ball, head between his legs, doing his best to shield his face.

Isaac felt a presence above him. He slowly lifted his head, using his hands as blinders to keep the wind from his face. He was surprised to see Jackson hovering above him, just looking down at him, a sad look in his eyes. Isaac's blue eyes pierced Jackson's and Jackson had to look away.

"Why-why are you outside? It's like twenty degrees out…" Jackson's voice expressed concern, and Isaac became confused.

"Why do you care?" He spat back. "You don't care about me anymore." Isaac's eyes were cold and heavy, he was no longer upset with the situation, just angry.

"I do- I do care about you, Isaac. I'm just- I'm not allowed." Jackson tried to explain the situation in a way where he wouldn't seem like the antagonist. Isaac wrapped his thin coat tighter to his body and cleared his throat.

"Why are you here?" Jackson blinked and kicked at the ice on the ground. "You can't acknowledge me at school, but here, in front of my house, in front of my dad, you can?" Isaac couldn't keep his voice from rising, he was boiling with anger inside. Jackson hastily brushed at a hot tear running down his cheek.

"Isaac, please, I'm not the bad guy in this situation! I want to be your friend! You need to know that I do care about you, okay?" Isaac's eyes seemed to bore into Jackson's soul.

"Why are you here?"

"I-Because you're alone-in the snow-on Christmas Eve!" Isaac shrugged, Christmas Eve was really like any other day to him. "I-here" Jackson held out a small parcel in is right hand. Isaac's eyes softened and he reached out a hand to accept the gift. He held the package in his arms, staring at it in bewilderment. "I know it doesn't make up for-well, anything."

Isaac slowly started to take off the paper, making sure to keep any from flying away in the wind. He held the odd cloth in his hands. He looked up at Jackson in confusion.

"What is it?"

"A scarf."

"Scarfs are for girls," he replied flatly. Jackson frowned.

"No, guys can wear them."

"Do you want me to get bullied, is that your grand plan?" Isaac was angry again, what was Jackson doing?

"What? Grand plan- no! I don't shop for boys, I don't know!" Isaac stared at him in utter annoyance.

"Would you wear this if I got it for you?" Jackson looked down, concentrating on knocking a chunk of ice free, with his foot, from the pavement.

"I thought you would like it," he mumbled. Jackson sounded genuine, but Isaac couldn't wrap his head around the boy standing in front of him. "It'll keep you warm-when you're outside in winter?" Jackson offered. Isaac shrugged back, threading his fingers through the material in his hands.

"What did my dad say to you?" Jackson looked up from his feet. Isaac's eyes were wide, and he seemed to have calmed down a bit.

"He didn't," Jackson replied. "He talked to my parents, they won't tell me what he said, but it wasn't nice, I know that." Isaac didn't look satisfied with that answer.

"My parent's told me I wasn't allowed to talk to you anymore and-" Isaac cut Jackson off.

"Where do they think you are right now?" Jackson shook his head.

"I snuck out the back door and walked around so they wouldn't hear me leave. They don't know I'm gone."

"What if they see you're missing?" Isaac shot back at him. Jackson was getting sick of all the questions, but he knew he owed Isaac at least some answers.

"I don't really care right now, Isaac. Are you okay?" Jackson had gotten down on Isaac's level, forcing their eyes to meet. Isaac ignored the question.

"Are you going to talk to me again? At school?" Jackson sighed, he didn't need this right now, but he had to be honest.

"I can't, Isaac."

"What the fuck?" Isaac yelled, pushing Jackson backwards. Jackson was shocked by both the language Isaac had used and the fact he had pushed him. Jackson choked back tears, he didn't want Isaac to hate him. He pulled himself back up to face Isaac, but Isaac's back was now to Jackson. Jackson stood up.

"Isaac, please! You're overreacting!"

"Overreacting?" The malice in Isaac's voice was at an all time high. Isaac threw himself up off the ground. "Don't you ever say I'm overreacting!" Isaac stepped towards Jackson, inches from his face.

"Isaac, please calm down!" Jackson put his hands on Isaac's shoulders, which was obviously a terrible choice as Isaac reacted right away, throwing a punch at Jackson. If it weren't for Jackson's insane reflexes, built up from lacrosse, he would have easily been smacked right in the face, but he caught Isaac's fist and held onto it.

"I trusted you more than i've ever trusted anyone and you just left me!" He screamed, forcing his hand out of Jackson's tight grip, moving again to attack him. Jackson easily defended himself against Isaac's blows, what was wrong with him?

"Stop yelling, Isaac!" Jackson hissed at him, trying to force Isaac back to the ground. Isaac's breathing was getting heavier, and his aims at Jackson slowed down. "I didn't leave you, Isaac! I'm right here, I can't control your father!" Jackson was trying his best to keep his voice lowered, but he was getting almost as worked up as Isaac.

Isaac stopped pushing on Jackson. His teeth were tightly grit together and he stood opposite the taller boy, his eyes heavy with anger.

"What happened to you _wanting_ me to trust you, Jackson? I told you everything. _Everything_. You're the only person I can talk to! Did you know my dad locks me in a freezer?" Jackson's eyes grew wide and he stared at the smaller boy. What? "Well, he does," Isaac continued. "It's why I can't handle small places. He traps me for hours at a time. Did you even notice all the scrapes and bruises? Did you notice all I wear are long sleeved shirts? You used to _care_, Jackson!" Isaac's voice was rising in volume again, and he started to speak faster, pouring out everything he thought, everything that had happened, he needed Jackson to hear him.

"Isaac, stop-stop please!" Isaac noticed Jackson was crying as well. Granted, not as hard as Isaac, but tears were still flowing. Isaac's whole body was shaking and he looked seconds away from collapsing into the frozen terrain below.

"I care about you, Isaac!" Jackson swallowed a lump in his throat and continued. "I care too much! I have since the day I met you! I don't know why, but I do! Okay? I really fucking do!" Isaac froze where he was standing, not from the cold, but from Jackson's words. "I only stayed away because I knew your dad would hurt you. I _knew_! I stayed away to protect you! You think it wasn't hard for me? I noticed every single tiny, new scratch you got. I had to sit in class, _staring_ at you, knowing the _hell_ you were going through! It was torture not being able to do anything about it. I couldn't even _talk_ to you about it! I couldn't talk to _anyone_. Because I made a _promise_. A promise to _you_ that I wouldn't! And I care, Isaac. I _care_! I care about you more than anyone else on this _goddamn_ planet and I don't have a clue as to why! So I care. Don't ever assume that I don't! Don't _patronise_ me with your stories because they hurt me _just as much_ as they hurt you and it hurts a whole _fucking_ lot!"

Jackson wasn't fighting back the tears anymore. He knew he would regret being so open to Isaac, but right now he just needed to yell. His vision was hazy from the tears pooling in his eyes, but he could clearly see Isaac in front of him, his head ducked down, ready to be hit.

Jackson panicked and wiped his face.

"Isaac?" He tried to make his tone as calm as possible. "Isaac, I'm not going to hit you, I'd never hit you, I'd never hurt you." Jackson was able to slow his breathing down well enough to maintain a calm voice. How had he forgotten about Isaac's sensitivity to that tone of voice? He mentally kicked himself.

Isaac was shaking his head. "I deserve it," he mumbled. Jackson felt pain run through him.

"No. Isaac, you don't ever deserve to be hurt. _Ever_."

"I hit you like a hundred times!" Isaac started to collapse, but Jackson caught him on the way down. Jackson shifted his weight in order to pull Isaac back onto his feet. He was much lighter than Jackson had anticipated.

"I can take it, Isaac. I want to get beat up for a profession, remember?" Jackson saw a small smile on Isaac's face. The smile faded after a few seconds.

"I was angry. I didn't mean to hurt you, or curse at you." Jackson smiled internally, Isaac thought an expletive had the same effect as a punch.

"Don't apologise, okay?" Jackson pulled Isaac's chin up to look him in the eyes. Isaac nodded. "I was being a dick. I thought I was helping you more by staying away. I was wrong, obviously." Isaac's eyes got brighter.

"So you'll talk to me again?"

"Of course," Jackson replied, giving Isaac the best smile he could manage. Jackson heard Isaac let go of the breath he had been holding. He thought after his speech Isaac would have known, sure thing, Jackson would stay with him, but obviously he still had his doubts. Jackson realised his hands were still against Isaac's face and he quickly dropped them to his side, flushing pink. Isaac continued to stare at Jackson, looking into his eyes.

"Happy Christmas." Jackson broke the silence.

"Thanks for the gift," Isaac awkwardly mumbled, amazingly he had managed to hold onto the scarf through the fight. "I didn't really get you anything." Isaac got red in the face and tried to avoid eye contact with Jackson.

"I don't need anything, Isaac. I got you back, that's better than any tangible present." Isaac felt that same strange feeling in the pit of his stomach, it was a mix between being tickled from the inside and feeling like vomiting. Jackson realised what he said and looked down at his feet. They stood in the freezing winds in an awkward silence.

"Jackson?" Jackson looked up and saw Isaac was staring at him, worried.

"Yeah?"

"What did your parents say, exactly? To you, I mean, about me."

Jackson let out a shaky breath as he tried to recall the chat with his parents, it had been months ago. "They told me your dad had come by. I swear they wouldn't tell me what he said to them, but my parents were upset so I know it wasn't good. I was nervous after hearing that your dad had talked to them, I freaked out. They told me that I shouldn't be hanging around you anymore and I guess I blew it way out of proportion. I thought your dad may have threatened my parents. I thought that maybe if I continued to talk with you that you would get hurt even worse. I took it way too serious, I know," Jackson admitted.

Isaac seemed to understand, and he nodded in acceptance. "I guess it makes sense, but…" Isaac stopped himself before he said more.

"But?" Jackson questioned. Isaac just shook his head. Jackson shrugged and decided to drop it, he didn't want to risk running into another argument.

"Come to my house." It sounded like more of a command than an offer. Isaac looked at Jackson quizzically.

"But your parents?"

"They really can't do anything about it, Isaac. They're not going to kick you out."

"But what if my dad notices I left the house?" Jackson frowned, he didn't want Isaac to get beaten from leaving, but he couldn't let him sit out here all night, besides, he was freezing.

Before Jackson could come up with a solution, Isaac spoke again. "No, I don't care actually. He kicked me out, I doubt he even remembers about me until morning." Jackson smiled at Isaac bravery, but he always knew the kid was tough. They both walked across the street to Jackson's house, having to go through the backdoor again.


	7. Chapter 7

"Are you cold?"

"Freezing," Isaac admitted. Jackson went to the hall cupboard and pulled out an oversized coat. He gave it to Isaac, who put it on hastily. The sleeves went way past his fingertips and the bottom hem reached his knees, he looked goofy, but a cute goofy. Wait. What? Jackson tried to erase the thought from his mind, but it was hard when the kid stood right in front of him.

"It doesn't fit very well," Isaac's comment snapped Jackson out of his thoughts. Jackson smiled.

"It will keep you warm," Jackson offered, walking towards the kitchen. Isaac started to follow but paused. "Do you want something to drink?" Jackson's voice came from the kitchen. Isaac decided to walk towards him, not wanting him to have to yell across the house. Jackson raised his eyebrows at Isaac. Isaac shrugged.

"We have coffee, tea, eggnog- but it may be alcoholic- hot chocolate?" Isaac chose the latter. "Okay, sit down, I'll make some." Isaac looked around for a place to sit. "Just sit on the countertop," Jackson offered, noticing Isaac's search for a chair. Isaac hesitated. Jackson realised Isaac would have never dared sit on a counter at his own house. "It's fine, I do it all the time— really." Isaac gave in and pulled his body up to sit on a counter at the far edge of the room, trying to stay out of Jackson's way.

"Do you know how to make hot chocolate?" Isaac asked out of curiosity before realising it was probably a rude to assume he didn't.

Jackson laughed. "No, not really. We've got a machine that does it, all I have to do is put in the mix." Jackson pointed at the black box-shaped thing in front of him. Isaac was impressed, he'd never had a coffee maker before, his dad thought they were a waste of money.

"I think it's pretty simple though, all you do is heat up water and stir in the powder. This thing just makes it easier to heat and stir," Jackson continued. Isaac nodded, not sure what else to say.

Jackson made two cups and handed Isaac the larger one. "You should probably drink it all, you were out there for a long time." Isaac nodded but kept the cup away from his lips.

Jackson blew on his drink and stood opposite Isaac, staring at him.

"Jackson?" Isaac's voice once again snapped Jackson from thoughts he would definitely rather not share.

"Hmm?" Jackson sounded a little out of it, even to himself. He blinked hard before looking at Isaac.

"Are you okay?" Isaac sounded worried, as if their friendship was going down hill again.

Jackson nodded his head vigorously. "Yeah, no, I'm good!" He smiled at Isaac, and Isaac gave him a half smile back. "Have you ever done anything for Christmas?"

Isaac's mouth went back to a small frown and he took a minute to think. Jackson realised he may have overstepped boundaries by asking the question but he found it hard to keep his mouth shut.

"Not really," Isaac admitted. "Camden used to get me a present or two, but that was about it."

"You've never even had a Christmas tree?" Isaac shook his head and looked down at his feet. Jackson sighed and grabbed Isaac's wrist, lightly pulling him forward and off the counter.

Isaac was dragged out of the kitchen and into an elegant dining room he had never been in before. In the back corner of the room there was a magnificent tree covered in hundreds of baubles and ornaments. On the top of the tree there was, of course, an angel.

Isaac stared at the tree in amazement. He had never seen anything so beautiful that wasn't on the television or in a magazine. Jackson smiled at the boy's wide eyes and awe. It was hard for him to believe that Isaac had never had a Christmas tree. Everyone gets Christmas trees!

"It's beautiful," Isaac complimented, unable to peel his eyes away. Jackson shrugged, it was just a normal tree.

"Hey, close your eyes!"

"Uh, why?" Isaac looked a little uneasy following that command.

"Trust me." Jackson looked Isaac in the eyes and Isaac nodded, slowing closing his eyes.

"Okay, don't open until I say so." Jackson hurried around the back of the tree, flipping a switch, ran to the opposite side of the room, flipping another switch, and then back to Isaac. "Open."

Isaac opened his eyes and was even more flabbergasted than he had been when he first saw the tree. The whole tree was lit up in the now dark room. There were many different colours, some simple a white, and some bright and neon, it looked magnificent. Isaac was speechless.

"Better?" All Isaac could do was nod, but it was a very enthusiastic nod. Isaac found it impossible to keep his eyes off the tree and, after a long few minutes of staring, Jackson had to guide him out of the room and back into the kitchen.

"Sorry," Isaac apologised.

"Don't apologise, I would respond like that too if I had never had a Christmas tree." Isaac shrugged. "It shouldn't be hot anymore," Jackson said, pointing at Isaac's untouched hot chocolate sitting on the counter.

Isaac grabbed the mug and took a sip, the warm liquid felt amazing running down his throat and it heated his whole body, he hadn't realised his throat hurt so much. He downed the drink in a manner of seconds and Jackson watched in amusement.

"Do you want mine?" Isaac declined the offer.

"I'm fine now."

"When was the last time you drank anything? Before that, I mean." Jackson regretted the words after he said them. He was acting over protective and patently again. Isaac shrugged. Jackson opened his mouth to speak, but held his tongue. Isaac knows how to take care of himself, Jackson mentally reminded himself.

"I should go." Isaac set down the mug on the counter, moving towards the back door.

"What? Why?"

"It's nine-thirty." Isaac pointed at the clock. "And it's Christmas tomorrow. I bet you're doing things with your family, I shouldn't keep you up." Jackson shook his head as Isaac spoke.

"Isaac, it's _nine-thirty_. I'm probably going to sleep at earliest maybe two. And what are you going back to? Sitting in the freezing cold?" Isaac was looking at the floor, shuffling his feet. "Do you wanna play video games? I got Call of Duty: World at War!"

"I'm terrible at video games, especially the shooting ones." Isaac mumbled. Jackson took him by the arm again and lightly pulled him towards the stairs.

"I'll give you a handicap," he promised. Isaac let himself be pulled by Jackson, not giving up much of a fight as he knew he would give in.

—-

Isaac sat on the bed, watching Jackson set up the game. Jackson picked up two controllers, tossing one behind him. He heard a yelp and turned around to see Isaac in a ball, hands in front of his face. Shit. He had completely spaced on the throwing thing.

"Sorry, sorry, sorry, Isaac," Jackson apologised over and over again. He moved over to where Isaac was curled up on the bed, putting a hand on his shoulder. "I forgot," he admitted. Isaac looked up and shook his head.

"It's okay. It's not your fault. No one normal reacts like that." Isaac's voice was low and uneasy.

"No, it's a completely normal reaction, seriously." Jackson tried to reassure him. Isaac nodded and pulled himself back up into a seated position. Jackson retrieved the controller from the floor and made sure to place it in Isaac's hand.

They played for an hour, Isaac, even with every handicap Jackson could think of, not getting a single kill the entire time. Jackson started to wonder if maybe Isaac was being bad on purpose, surely no one could be that terrible?

At fifteen to eleven, a name popped up in the corner of the TV with the status 'online' next to it.

"Who is Dmaha-what?" Isaac wondered out loud, unable to read the word on the screen. Jackson laughed at Isaac's effort to read the name.

"It's Danny, from school." Isaac's eyebrows creased.

"What is his name on this?"

"It's a 'd' and then his surname, 'Mahaelani'," Jackson explained, still chuckling from Isaac's attempt.

"Oh." Isaac wasn't nearly as amused as Jackson was. "He plays the game?" Jackson noticed a hint of jealous in Isaac's voice but he decided to ignore it.

"Uh, yeah. Lots of guys from school do." Isaac slowly nodded, returning to focusing on the game. "Do you wanna add him to the game? It'll be fun!"

"No," Isaac responded immediately. "I mean- I just don't really want to play this anymore. You must be getting sick of beating me."

"Okay. So it's cool if I just play with Danny alone?"

"What?" The word slipped out of Isaac's mouth in an annoyed tone. Jackson picked up on it.

"Do you wanna watch or something?"

"No I-" Isaac couldn't figure out how to tell Jackson to just get off the Xbox. "Maybe I should just go?"

"No! No don't go!" Wow. That sounded desperate, Jackson thought. Isaac must have picked up on the tone too because he decided to stay. Isaac stopped trying to fight the fact that Jackson was friends with Danny, and let them play together while Isaac lied down on Jackson's bed, watching them shoot each other.

At half past eleven, Danny had to go offline and Jackson decided to turn his game off as well. After putting away the controller and turning off the TV, Jackson faced his bad and jumped to see Isaac asleep on top of it.

His heart was racing, how could he have forgotten Isaac was there?

"Isaac?" Jackson asked, testing if he was asleep. Isaac didn't stir. Jackson climbed on the bed and poked Isaac on the shoulder. Nothing. Jackson sighed, he knew Isaac must be tired but Jackson knew couldn't leave him in his bed all night, his parents would definitely be surprised to see him Christmas morning.

"Isaac." Jackson said his name a little louder this time. It was hard for him to figure whether or not he should touch Isaac. What if he freaked out? "Isaac, wake up!" Jackson slightly pushed on Isaac's right shoulder. Isaac rocked to his left side, but didn't wake up.

Jackson sighed and turned on the TV, deciding to give Isaac an hour of rest.

—-

Isaac woke to Jackson hovering over him and lightly shaking his shoulders. "What?" Isaac mumbled, trying to figure out where he was. He blinked a few times, trying to clear his vision. Jackson's bedroom. Had he fallen asleep? He couldn't recall anything after wanting to leave.

"Morning." Jackson smiled at Isaac, his face a foot above the smaller boys. Isaac looked at Jackson, he was kneeling on the mattress, straddling Isaac.

"I couldn't figure out how to wake you," Jackson replied, shrugging.

"Why are you straddling me?" Jackson flushed red and climbed off of Isaac, rolling onto the other side of the bed. Isaac was finding it difficult to focus on anything. Had he just asked Jackson about straddling him?

Jackson cleared his throat. "Do you need to be home?"

"What? What time is it?" Isaac panicked, shooting up out of the bed.

"Calm down, calm down! It's two in the morning!" Jackson was kneeling on the bed again, his hand on Isaac's shoulder, trying to keep him from falling off the bed.

"What? Why did you wake me up? Why are _you_ awake? Isaac was more confused than he had ever been. He hated taking naps, they always threw him off.

"I'm awake to wake you up. I didn't know what time you had to be home but you were asleep so I decided to let you sleep" Isaac sat back against the headboard of the bed, trying to gather a coherent thought.

"I don't know," Isaac admitted. "He could already know I'm gone. In that case, I don't want to ever go back. But, if he's not awake yet I'm guessing he will be around eight.

"So we've got a good five hours? What do you want to do?" Jackson was hyped up, probably on sugar.

"Sleep?" Isaac offered. Jackson frowned.

"You just slept! You don't want to do anything? It's Christmas!"

"What did you eat?" Isaac wondered aloud, collapsing back onto the bed. "I can't even get my thoughts straight and you're bouncing off the walls!" Isaac closed his eyes and then felt Jackson lightly tugging on his arm.

"Get up! Come on!"

"Jackson! It's two in the morning, there isn't anything to do!" Isaac pulled his arm back and flopped back into the mattress. Jackson's bed was unbelievably comfortable. Jackson released a sigh of frustration and fell down on the bed beside Isaac.

"What do you do all day? When you're home with your dad?" Isaac was confused where the question had come from, he shrugged.

"Nothing, really. Read?" Jackson made a strange noise. "What does that mean?"

"It's boring, isn't it?"

"It beats being locked in a freezer for hours at a time." Isaac's voice got deeper and more forceful as he mentioned the freezer.

"I'm sorry, Isaac." Isaac tuned on his side to look at Jackson.

"Don't apologise, okay?" His voice was stern, Jackson was a little taken aback, he kept his mouth shut. "I don't want you feeling sorry for me. Or-or being my friend just because of my home situation. I told you I don't need fixing."

"I know," Jackson admitted. "It's just not fair, it's hard not to feel bad for you." Isaac gave him a sad smile.

"I'm okay though. I'm always okay." He knew Jackson was still worried, but he didn't know what else to say. He and Jackson both knew one piece of terrible news could crack Isaac's skull open. "What are you getting for Christmas?" Isaac changed the subject.

"I'm not supposed to know, Isaac."

"But you didn't ask for anything?" Jackson shrugged.

"I don't want to sound like a brat, but I really have everything I need." Isaac didn't know what to say, he couldn't relate. He decided to just nod. "I'll tell you what I get tomorrow, okay?" Isaac agreed immediately. He had plans to see Jackson again in a few hours, his friend was definitely back.

Isaac awoke to the sun streaming through Jackson's windows and directly onto his face. He panicked for a moment, searching for a clock. Six-thirty, he read. Isaac figured he wanted to be home by seven, just in case his dad woke up before eight. He looked at Jackson, he was curled up in a ball closer to Isaac than he was the other side of the bed.

Isaac inched off the bed, careful not to wake Jackson. He stripped off the coat, folded it, and put it at the foot of Jackson's bed. He thought about leaving a note, but decided against it. He didn't want to be caught rummaging through Jackson's things trying to look for paper and a pen.

Isaac crept out of the house through the backdoor, trying to stay as quiet as he could. He ran across the street and jumped over his back fence as fast as he could. All the doors and windows were closed. He tried the backdoor, but it was locked. He probably would have died of hypothermia if Jackson hadn't come to rescue him. Did his dad really not care about leaving him out here all night? Isaac knew the holidays were tough for his dad though.

Isaac took a seat next to the the door, curling back up into a ball.


	8. Chapter 8

Jackson woke up to find an empty space to the right of him. He rubbed his eyes, searching for Isaac. He saw the folded up coat on his bed and realised Isaac must have left early, to ensure he'd be there when his dad woke up.

Jackson checked the clock on his bedside table, it was only seven-thirty. He wandered down the stairs and into the kitchen, making some cereal and sitting down to watch cartoons.

His parent's loved celebrating Christmas, but not until the afternoon when all of his 'family' could come around. Which meant, of course, no presents until everyone arrived. And, if Jackson were honest, he didn't really care about getting the presents, he just wanted to see Isaac again.

The morning went by extremely slow. Jackson's parents woke up at nine, complaining about wanting to make Jackson a special Christmas breakfast.

His 'relatives' started arriving at ten, but the last lot didn't show up until almost twelve. Jackson was starting to get very impatient, especially with the horde of toddlers running around his house, touching his stuff.

Finally, they got around to opening the presents. The younger kids tore through all of theirs in a matter of seconds, and were off running around once again. Jackson was surprised to receive a brand new iPhone 3G, his parents had bought him a phone only a few months earlier and it still worked fine.

In addition to the phone, Jackson got a few video games he had asked for, a new lacrosse head-which really impressed him-, a couple pairs of socks, new shoes, and new lacrosse gloves. He thanked his parents and then dismissed himself from the mass of people surrounding him.

Jackson found the only quiet place in his whole house, the bathroom, and sat down on the edge of the tub with his new phone, figuring out how it worked. He noticed his parents had also gotten him a new sim card, were they paying for both? Did they know they were paying for both?

Jackson's stomach rumbled loudly and he realised he hadn't really eaten anything but candy canes since his bowl of cereal. He emerged from his hiding spot to ask his mom when lunch would be. "Four," she replied. Four? That wasn't an appropriate time to have lunch, but Jackson didn't want to argue.

"Can I invite a friend?" Jackson's mom agreed without questioning who the friend was, or why they didn't have their own Christmas lunch to attend.

Jackson raced out of the house, happy to get away. He was hallway across the street when the sudden realisation of Isaac's dad hit him. Jackson had no way to contact Isaac without showing up on his doorstep. But they had made plans, right?

Jackson stood in the middle of the road, unsure of what to do. He decided to cross anyway. He knew he would be jeopardising Isaac's safety by being close to the house, but he couldn't leave the kid all alone on Christmas Day.

Jackson stood on the pavement, staring at Isaac's house. They really needed walky-talkies or something. Jackson knew he was fighting a losing battle, Isaac is alone if he doesn't go, but may get hurt if he does.

Jackson took the path he had seen Isaac use multiple times, climbing over the gate into the backyard. He landed hard on the ground beneath him, almost falling down from the impact. He ambled his way around the the back of the house. Jackson yelped when he saw Isaac curled up next to the door.

"Isaac?" He hissed. Isaac looked up, his lips were a bright blue, his face not much better, and there was ice frozen in his curls. "Have you not been inside since you left my house?" Isaac shook his head. Jackson huffed in annoyance and grabbed Isaac's wrist, it was frozen. Isaac didn't even flinch at the movement, he looked completely out of it.

Jackson managed to half carry, half drag Isaac out of the backyard and across the road to his house. Jackson realised that with all the commotion, it would be impossible to sneak Isaac through the house.

Jackson accepted that he would have to take Isaac through the house, he just hoped everyone was still crowded in the dining room. Jackson opened the front door, so far, so good. Jackson stumbled over the threshold, struggling to carry Isaac. They reached the stairs and Jackson groaned. He tried to work as quickly as he could, forcing Isaac to stay awake.

He was out of breath and panting hard when they reached the top of the steps. He mustered up the rest of his strength in order to carry Isaac to his bedroom. He fell against the door, causing it to slam open. He dumped Isaac on the bed before realising two of his cousins were messing with his Xbox. He snatched them by their shirt collars and threw them out the door. He slammed and locked the door, and passed out on the floor.

Jackson regained consciousness a few moments later. He really regretted not grabbing a snack before going on his quest to rescue Isaac.

"Isaac!" He yelped, pushing himself up onto his feet. Isaac was in the same position Jackson had dumped him in. His face wasn't as blue as it had been, but still worse than Jackson had ever seen. Isaac was violently shivering and his clothes were damp from the ice. Should I take them off? No! But he'll get hypothermia if I don't. But I can't undress him! Jackson mentally fought with himself, pacing back and forth through out the room.

Jackson decides to take of Isaac's shirt, that's acceptable, right? I mean the kid was practically dying of hypothermia, he had to do something. He reached for the hem of Isaac's shirt. As his fingers lightly traced Isaac's torso, the smaller boy squirmed. Jackson jumped back. Okay, bad idea.

He tried waking up Isaac instead. He pushed and pulled lightly on his shoulders and shook him side to side. Isaac was still damp and cold, and his clothes stuck to his skin.

Jackson did the only other logical thing he could think of. He went to his bathroom and grabbed the hairdryer under the skink. He plugged it into the outlet closest to his bed and pulled Isaac towards where the cord could barely reach. He flipped it onto high power and high heat.

Jackson felt ridiculous standing over Isaac holding a hairdryer down on him. After a couple minutes he switched it off and checked to see if Isaac had dried. He hadn't remotely, but his chest was now really hot.

Isaac was still unconscious and Jackson had run out of ideas. He sat down at his desk and turned on his computer. He opened google and typed, '**How to warm a wet, cold person.**' fifteen million results, but nothing relevant on the first page. He changed the wording to, '**How to cure hypothermia?**' He clicked the first link he saw, a first aid website. The top of the page read, '**IF YOU SUSPECT HYPOTHERMIA, CALL 911.**' Shit.

Jackson tried not to worry, he didn't even know if Isaac had hypothermia. What even was hypothermia? He clicked on the tab marked, '**Symptoms**.' Confusion? Well, he's asleep, so no. Loss of consciousness? Okay, yes. Numb hands and feet? Check. Shivering? Definitely. Okay, so it may be a little more serious than Jackson had anticipated. Seriously, who leaves a twelve-year-old outside in the dead of winter on Christmas?

Next, he googled home cures. Get the person inside, okay perfect. Remove all wet clothes. Jackson groaned. He felt like he would be violating Isaac in so many different ways, but it was violating or dying.

"Isaac?" Jackson tried waking him again. Okay, maybe I should just take him to hospital, he thought. Jackson pinched the bridge of his nose and sat down next to Isaac's stirring body. He was going to have to go through with it.

Jackson moved slowly, grabbing the hem of Isaac's shirt and slowly peeling it up and over his body. He moved Isaac's hands up, so he could easily slide the shirt off.

Jackson tossed the wet shirt into his laundry hamper and turned to face Isaac. He had to blink to make sure he wasn't imagining something. Isaac's torso was covered in scars, some old, some fresh. He had purple and black bruises all over his chest and upper arms. Jackson whimpered. It was terrible to look at, but he couldn't peel his eyes away. What the hell was this man doing to his son? Jackson knew it was bad, but not this bad. Definitely not this bad.

Isaac started to violently shake, Jackson cursed. He ripped open his clothes drawers and pulled out the first shirt he saw, pulling it over Isaac's head and onto his body. He got stuck at Isaac's arms, however, and the shirt was slightly strangling Isaac.

Jackson stepped back and took a deep breath, like he was going for the winning goal in lacrosse. He re-approached Isaac and slowly positioned his arms, gliding the shirt down over them.

Jackson stood back to look at Isaac, he knew switching his shirt was not going to fix the entire problem. He looked at Isaac's pants. He had to, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. He was so over stepping boundaries, he tried to remind himself Isaac could die, but it didn't help much.

Jackson stood in the middle of the room, staring at Isaac. He didn't know what to do, why was he in this situation? He thought about telling his mom, at least his mom would help. She would call the police though, Jackson debated. He knew his dad was out of the selection, that would just be too awkward.

Jackson turned back to his trusted website. Warm drinks could help. He decided he would give it a shot. He trusted Isaac alone in the room for a few minutes, he was unconscious anyway.

Jackson made it to the kitchen, only having to stop and chat with three of his relatives. He made hot chocolate as quickly as he could. He glanced at the clock, only an hour until dinner, suddenly, time could not go by any faster.

He poured the whole pitcher into a giant breakfast cup and quickly made his way back up the stairs. He was happy his parents hadn't seen him, they would have forced him to stay downstairs and make small talk with people he barely knew.

Isaac was still in the same position Jackson had left him minutes before.

The website did mention the person being conscious while drinking, but that wasn't going to happen. Jackson pulled Isaac up against the headboard of his bed, resting his head against the pillows. He blew on the drink and then held it up to Isaac's mouth, tipping it forward. He knew he would regret this, his bed would be a mess.

Thankfully, the drink wasn't rejected. Isaac must have been at least halfway conscious because he was swallowing. Isaac's eyes fluttered open.

"Isaac!" Jackson's voice came out high and squeaky. Isaac blinked at him. Jackson knew he was probably more out of it than in, but he was alive. Isaac made a weird sound that sounded like a cat in a blender. "Isaac, you need to change, okay?" Isaac half nodded at him, but slouched down into the bed. "No! Come on!" Jackson grabbed Isaac's wrists, hoisting him up. "You can't fall asleep!"

"What did you get for Christmas?" Isaac mumbled, falling against Jackson's shoulder.

"What?" Jackson was outrageously confused, the kid was half dying yet all he cares about are Jackson's Christmas presents? Jackson shook his head. "Isaac, I'm going to give you some pants, you need to change into them, do you understand?" Isaac nodded sloppily, his head staying down. "Okay, you're going to have to stand up." Isaac put all his weight against Jackson and Jackson half carried, half pulled Isaac up into a standing position. "Go into my bathroom, you can change, okay?" Even only five steps away, Jackson still had to support Isaac. He left Isaac leaning against the bathroom door and went to get a pair of sweatpants from his drawers.

Isaac took the pants from Jackson's hand and stumbled trying to close the door. He braced himself on the sink and pushed it closed.

Jackson waited from what seemed like hours, staring at the closed door. He heard a loud thunk and the door flew open, Isaac looked exhausted.

"Isaac, are you okay?"

"Yeah," Isaac nodded, "Can I just sit down?" Jackson helped him to the bed, Isaac sat and then fell backwards onto his back.

"Isaac, you can't fall asleep," Jackson warned. Isaac mumbled in agreement, forcing himself back to a seated position. He pulled his knees up close to his chest. "Are you cold?" Isaac shook his head.

"Not anymore, I can't really feel anything."

"Why didn't you come back to my house?"

"I-I fell asleep when the back door was locked, I woke up and I couldn't move?"

"Why would you fall asleep in the snow, Isaac?" Jackson's voice was getting louder and angrier. Isaac whimpered. "Never mind," Jackson muttered, pacing back and forth. "I have to go down to eat dinner in fifteen minutes," Jackson commented, realising the time.

"I'll be fine."

"No, you need to come eat something." Jackson's face was stern.

"I can't. You said so yourself, you're not supposed to be hanging out with me."

"I don't care. It's not like they're gonna kick you back outside. You look half dead, Isaac." Isaac was quiet, but nodded in agreement.

Jackson made Isaac finish the rest of the hot chocolate, and helped him stand up and walk around a bit. He was still extremely weak, but Jackson was certain he would be okay after food and a good night's sleep.

As predicted, Jackson's mom called him down for dinner five minutes early. Isaac used Jackson as a crutch to get down the steps, but managed to walk to the dining room.

Jackson's mom saw Isaac, and Jackson swore he had never seen her so mad.

"Jackson, can I see you in the kitchen for a moment?" Jackson shot Isaac a guilty look as he followed his mom out of the room, he knew Isaac was now stuck with a bunch of strangers.

"Jackson, why did you bring him here?" Mrs Whittemore hissed. Jackson shrugged, trying to stay calm.

"You said I could invite a friend, I invited a friend."

"We agreed you weren't going to hang out with him anymore, you promised!"

"Well he's my friend. He's alone on Christmas! His dad- uh- had to go out." His mom opened her mouth, but shut it again. Jackson knew he had won, she had agreed.

"Go back in and sit down." Jackson obeyed, not to make his mother happy, but because he'd much rather be in there anyway.

He sat down next to Isaac, where they remained for the next two hours, making awkward small talk and sharing glances.

Finally, they were allowed to leave the table. Jackson noticed Isaac looked a lot better, and his face was back to a regular colour.

"Are you going to tell me what you got for Christmas?" Isaac asked as Jackson helped him up the staircase. Jackson smiled.

"Yes, I am. Go and sit on the bed." Isaac complied. "Okay, now close your eyes." And Isaac did as he was told, no hesitation. Jackson was expecting him to at least become skittish about it, but Isaac didn't. Jackson pulled his old phone out of his pocket, rolling it around in his hand. He grabbed Isaac's hand and pulled it out, making him clasp the phone. "Open your eyes." Isaac looked confused.

"Your cell phone? Why am I holding it?"

"Because it's yours now." Isaac stared wide-eyed at him.

"I'm not taking your phone, Jackson." He tried to give it back, but Jackson wouldn't accept it. Instead, he pulled out his new iPhone from his other pocket.

"My parents got me a new one, _and_, they're still paying for that one. I don't know how long it will take them to realise, but until it's disconnected, it's yours. Now you can text me if you're ever locked outside, or if you want to come over." Isaac shook his head, not knowing what to say. "You're accepting it, Isaac."

"You already gave me a gift! I didn't get you anything, I can't accept it."

"It's not a gift, it's a necessity, you _need_ a phone, Isaac. If you really feel bad about using it, only text or call _me_." Isaac still looked extremely uneasy, but he nodded.

Jackson showed Isaac the rest of his presents, and showed him how to use his new phone. At six, Isaac decided to go home. Jackson made him promise to call if he couldn't get back inside, but watched Isaac through his window anyway. Two minutes later, Jackson got a text.

**Received from** **Isaac 6.08:**

**_Fine. Dad asleep. Text if anything bad happens._**

Jackson assumed Isaac meant that he would text Jackson if something bad happened, not Jackson texting him.

**To Isaac 6.09**

**_Pls do. _**

Isaac didn't reply after that. Jackson assumed he was keeping the phone stowed away somewhere safe, just in case his dad found it.


	9. Chapter 9

The rest of the holidays sped by, Isaac came over whenever his dad was out, and it seemed as if freezing him out on Christmas had been the ultimate punishment for the season, as Isaac barely had any new cuts and bruises.

Of course, Jackson still had to schedule his time between Danny and Isaac. Danny went to visit family in Hawaii for the week after New Years, so he spent almost every waking hour in Isaac's company.

Isaac could never sleep over, though. He had to leave everyday before dinner, so there were no more late night video game tournaments.

Spending seven hours with Isaac was a lot more fun than Jackson would have imagined. Isaac was a lot more confident than he had been the previous year, and he trusted Jackson so much more.

His mom even took them down to the arcade a couple times, which Isaac really seemed to enjoy.

The more Jackson hung out with Isaac, the more he wanted to stay around him. It was different with Danny, Jackson liked hanging out with him and playing Lacrosse and video games, but Danny could eventually start to get on his nerves, and he would just need a break. He just wanted to be around Isaac all the time, and that was starting to concern him.

Jackson did miss Danny, and invited him to spend the night after he got back. He happily accepted.

—-

Jackson was on top of the bed, lying on his back, head hanging off the edge of the bed, and controller in the air. Danny sat below and to the right of him, full concentration mode. They were surrounded by half empty soft drinks and thousands of candy wrappers.

The match ended and Jackson cheered in victory, Danny just rolled his eyes. The clock blinked four in the morning.

"Can we go to bed now?" Jackson whined.

"Not until I beat you _fairly_!" Danny got mad an hour ago when Jackson had stopped trying in their matches and he made Jackson swear to try until Danny could finally beat him.

"Danny, look at how I'm sitting! I can't even see half the screen!" Danny turned around and stuck his tongue out. He started chugging the Mountain Dew closest to him. "Danny, why are you gay?" Danny choked on his drink, some of it spilling down his front. He was shocked, Jackson hadn't really brought that up since the first day of seventh grade. "Not in a gay way," Jackson added.

"You realise asking me about being gay, but saying 'not in a gay way' is kind of contradicting your question." Jackson gave him a confused look and Danny shook his head. "What are you asking me?" Jackson made an obnoxious sound as he rolled onto his stomach.

"I don't know." Danny put his controller down and turned his body towards Jackson. "Why do you think- er- know that you're gay?" Danny was confused, not because of the question, but because of Jackson's complete change in personality. All of a sudden he seemed completely invested and calm. Danny inferred he was serious from his change of tone.

"Because I find men attractive and not women? I see a dude and I'm like 'yes, attractive,' whereas girls it's more like, 'oh, she's pretty' and nothing really more. It's like opposite with you, except if I ever here the words 'he's pretty' come from your mouth, I would probably roll over and die." Danny noticed Jackson's facial expressions soften, he was definitely thinking a lot about what Danny had said. Jackson opened his mouth, but shut it before speaking. He paused, back in thought and then opened it again.

"Do you think I'm attractive?" Danny huffed in laughter, Jackson looked a tad offended.

"No, you're not my type," he answered simply, biting off the end of a Twizzler. "Don't ask me what my type is," Danny added before Jackson could speak again. Danny turned back around and picked up his controller. "Okay, let's go for round twelve," he suggested, trying to get off the subject. He sighed of relief when Jackson started the next round.

Danny admits he wasn't trying anymore, at least not trying a lot. It wasn't his fault though, why had Jackson brought that up? It seemed so weird and out of the blue, questioning him about being gay. Had something happened while he was away? Danny shook himself out of his thoughts, crying to concentrate on the game. It worked for about five minutes. What if Jackson thinks he's gay? It is a possibility, Danny thought.

Maybe Danny would check his internet history after Jackson fell asleep. No, he couldn't do that, could he? Jackson probably erases whatever he googles anyway. But he did have his own laptop, so would it be necessary? Danny pinched himself to come out of his thoughts. He realised he wasn't even playing anymore, but Jackson didn't seem to be either. Danny turned around. His best friend had fallen asleep with his head, neck, and left foot hanging off the bed, the rest of his body was splayed out.

Danny got up and picked up Jackson's controller, setting both of them down by the TV and turning the screen off. He cursed himself for chugging that last soda, he wasn't tired in the least.

He spotted Jackson's laptop, only a few feet away, it was so tempting. It didn't help that Danny knew his password either. He somehow found himself sitting in front of it. What if Jackson woke up? He didn't know if he would be able to lie, Jackson would surely be able to tell.

He shook his head. Jackson would tell him if he suspected anything of himself, right? Danny was his best friend. He left the laptop alone and climbed into the bed. He sat there, unable to fall asleep, and tried to figure out if there was anything else different about his best friend. He couldn't think of anything off the top of his head, other than he and Isaac becoming friends again, but that was before Danny had even left.

He figured Jackson was hanging out with Isaac a lot, but he wasn't sure how much. Maybe he was concerned Isaac was? Maybe he liked Isaac? Danny shook his head, trying to keep those thoughts out of his head. Isaac was cute, but in a little kid way. He still looked ten years old, and was as thin as a twig.

Danny rested his head against the headboard, trying to focus on anything other than Jackson, but he found it nearly impossible. Danny lost count of time, but he figured he fell asleep around six in the morning.

—-

Jackson woke up at nine, Danny was passed out next to him, looking wiped. He slipped out of his bed and went to have a quick shower. He ended up half falling asleep, and took over twenty minutes. Danny was still asleep by the time he had changed, he decided to let him be and go get breakfast.

He really only knew how to make cereal, so Jackson poured himself a big bowl of Frosted Flakes and settled down in front of the television. He watched morning cartoons, waiting for Danny to wake up. At twelve, there was still no sign of Danny, Jackson abandoned his spot on the couch and went to wake up his best friend.

He decided against using his tactic for waking up Isaac, it worked well, but he figured Danny may just freak out. Instead, he opted to throw pillows at Danny's body.

Slowly, Danny began to stir and whine through the pillows muffling his mouth.

"Get up! It's already midday!" Jackson yelled, bringing a pillow down on Danny's head. Danny retaliated, pulling the pillow from under his head out, and launching it at Jackson. Jackson caught it easily and laughed, Danny turned around, sticking his tongue out. "Get up." Danny groaned, but complied.

They headed back to the kitchen together, and Danny made bacon for the two of them. They made a huge mess in the kitchen somehow, spilling hot grease all over the counter, and orange juice all over the floor. Danny cleaned up while Jackson tried to stay out of the way.

Jackson could tell there was something on Danny's mind, but he couldn't figure out what. He knew it wasn't that serious, but he hoped it hadn't been about his question last night. It hadn't been one of the smoothest conversations Jackson had ever had, but it was something he needed to ask, even if he hadn't gotten close to any kind of answer he was looking for.

Being gay and having strong feelings for a friend was completely different. Totally different. Right? Yeah, he was overreacting, he was a teenage boy going through puberty, it was normal to want to ravish anyone you saw. But why wasn't he feeling the feelings for Isaac towards Danny? He couldn't explain it with having known Danny longer, because he met Isaac when he was ten.

He felt someone flick him on the head, and whipped around. Danny was staring at him, raising an eyebrow. "Are you okay?" Jackson nodded, coming out of his thoughts. Danny looked at him quizzically, but dropped it. That was one of Jackson's favourite things about his best friend, he didn't seem to carry on conversations that Jackson didn't want to, and they seemed to have a silent connection on that level.

Danny left that night, but was back a short two days later. The rest of the break sped by, and then they were back at school.


	10. Chapter 10

Second semester was a lot more fun for Jackson. He and Isaac were friends again, so he didn't have to avoid his gaze in the hallways, and they actually got to eat lunch together. Lacrosse season had also started, which occupied a lot of Jackson's time, and he loved every second of it. He managed to keep any strange thoughts he had at bay, even if one or two managed to sneak by every now and again.

Jackson blinked, and it was summer again. He had since, grown six inches, and now towered above Isaac, who still looked ten years old. And Jackson realised he now looked four years older than Isaac, and his thoughts were starting to get pretty fucked up. He was having a hard time convincing himself that it wasn't gay, because he knew it was. He wondered if Danny felt like this towards anyone, but he wouldn't ask.

He knew Danny was noticing his strange, spastic behaviour at times, but never brought it up, bless him.

The summer before eighth grade went pretty much like the summer before. He shared his time equally between Isaac and Danny, playing a lot of lacrosse and games with Danny, and spending a lot of time showing Isaac Beacon Hills, the kid hadn't ever actually gotten to go places.

Jackson took a lot of time analysing Danny, looking for signs of being gay, but he really couldn't see any.

From TV, Jackson knew gay guys tended to be like girls, hated sports, and had high voices, but Danny didn't conform to anything of the sort. He loved lacrosse, he loved video games, and his voice was getting much deeper.

Isaac, on the other hand, was terrible at video games, didn't care about any sports really, and his voice was still pretty high. But Isaac wasn't gay, and Jackson was totally thrown off. He figured he couldn't compare kids to adults in this type of situation.

Jackson fought his struggle all summer, but he kept it internal. Asking Danny again would be too obvious, and he definitely wasn't going to approach Isaac with it.

Jackson was disappointed to find out he had no classes this year with Isaac, and he only had one with Danny. Danny was put in every single advanced class, besides science.

The first day, Jackson spent lunch with Danny, as they had planned to meet buy the front doors after fourth bell.

On the second day, however, he wanted to sit with Isaac. Jackson ended up spending the whole lunch period walking around the school in search of the boy. He texted him three times, never getting a response.

Isaac responded to the texts in the next class period, apologising and saying he had his phone turned off. Who turned their phone off for lunch, and on for class? Jackson didn't respond, maybe he was a little upset.

They were finally free from school and Jackson was exiting the building, when he heard his name called. He whirled around, a little too eagerly, and was facing Isaac.

"Sorry about lunch," he apologised, rubbing the back of his neck. "Tomorrow?" Jackson shrugged, playing it off.

"Sure." Isaac grinned.

"Cool, I want you to meet someone!" Jackson's face dropped. Meet someone? Isaac started walking with Jackson, before realising he was heading to the lacrosse field. "Bye!" He seemed to be in a fantastic mood.

Jackson spent all of lacrosse practise thinking about whom Isaac had wanted him to meet. It was the third day of school, how could he already have replaced Jackson? Replaced? No, not the right word. He was getting all worked up over nothing, it was nothing, right?

At the end of practise, Jackson and Danny opted to go collect the balls that had been chucked far from the lot.

"What's up?" Jackson picked up a ball and threw it as far in field as he could.

"Nothing really," he looked at Danny, who was raising an eyebrow. He shrugged. "Just some…nothing, it's really nothing." Danny narrowed his eyes, obviously contemplating whether or not to press the issue. "Can I copy your science homework later?" Danny rolled his eyes and chucked a ball.

"I'll give it to you tomorrow morning, but get here at half past six." Jackson curtly nodded and then started jogging back towards the building.

Jackson spent the next morning stressing, not because he hadn't done his science homework or his maths, because he was meeting someone today. Not just someone, someone Isaac was friends with, talked with, trusted?

His stomach felt as if it had been twisted into a knot, he blindly copied the answers from Danny's paper, and crumpled the sheet into his bag. The morning went by slower than the last day of school had come last year, and that was immensely slow.

When the lunch bell rang, Jackson realised he didn't even know where to go. He texted Isaac.

**To Isaac 12.31: **

**Where r you?**

It took Isaac less than a minute to reply.

**Received from Isaac 12.31**

**_Meet outside the art room doors in the courtyard area?_**

Jackson took off, eager to get there as fast as possible. But, as he approached the hall to the art room, he realised he may not want to meet Isaac's friend, what if he had a girlfriend? What if? So what if he did?

Sure enough, there was a door right next to the art room, which led to an outside courtyard area. It was big, and there were a lot of projects scattered on the floor or on benches, obviously drying in the sun.

Jackson tapped his foot nervously, keeping an eye on the door at all times. He checked his watch, had it really only been two minutes? The door lurched forward and Jackson heart went with it, something he had never felt before, and it was a really strange feeling; Jackson wasn't sure he liked it.

Isaac came through, smiling. Jackson smiled until he saw a blond girl trailing him, his face dropped. Isaac noticed and gave him a quizzical look, which Jackson shrugged off. So it was a girlfriend? Why did that make Jackson upset? He should be _happy _for Isaac.

The girl had wild hair, and her clothes looked lopsided on her. She looked super nervous, as if she were to crack any moment. Jackson raised an eyebrow.

"This is Erica, Jackson." Jackson gave Erica a fake smile, she didn't return one. "Erica is new this year, and she's in a lot of my classes. I decided to show her around." Jackson's smile turned genuine, it was great hearing Isaac so happy, like he wasn't the one that was in need of help anymore, and Jackson could see why he had taken a liking to Erica. She looked worse off than he did. She was skinny, skinny to the point where all her bones stuck out. She looked one tap away from collapsing, and she seemed to be shaking non-stop.

"So your classes been good?" Isaac smiled, and sat down on the brick by Jackson's feet, leaving space next to him. Jackson was about to move there, when Erica scurried around and threw herself down, Jackson scrunched his nose and cleared his throat.

"Yeah, only got one with Danny though…and nothing with you…" Isaac nodded.

"It sucks, not fair. And you've got lacrosse until my dad gets home, isn't lacrosse like a spring thing or something?" Jackson huffed out laughter.

"Yeah but it's off-season, so we just practise, run, throw balls, get ready for the spring." Isaac made a farting noise with his mouth.

"Boring." Jackson noticed too well how confident Isaac was becoming, of course his dad was still affecting him immensely, but he seemed to be pushing that totally away, in order to make Erica feel comfortable.

Erica tucked her knees to her chest, she stared at Isaac, and then switched her gaze to Jackson, it slightly creeped him out.

Isaac talked most of the lunch break, Erica seemed too scared to speak, and Jackson felt as if he did, Erica would have a fit.

Jackson had never been happier to part from Isaac, he just needed to get out of there. As soon as the bell rang, he was gone. He got a text from Isaac the next class period

**Received from Isaac 1.53:**

**_Are you okay? You were acting strange at lunch._**

**To Isaac 1.55:**

**_I'm fine. Erica was a little strange? Was she ok?_**

Jackson looked up from his lap, only to be face-to-face with his teacher. She gave him an annoyed look and snatched his phone.

"You can get it tomorrow," she snapped, throwing the phone in her desk drawer. Jackson's mouth dropped open. Tomorrow? Were teachers even allowed to do that? He spend the rest of the day in a bad mood. What if he had needed his phone to get home? He almost contemplating telling his parents, but he knew they would make a bigger fuss than it was even worth.

—-

Isaac started to worry around two-thirty, Jackson was normally very prompt when replying to texts, maybe he was mad about Erica? But what could have happened that Jackson would be mad about? Sure, Erica was awkward and shy, but she was epileptic, she couldn't help it. Maybe he just needed to explain it to Jackson.

But what could explain the way Jackson's face dropped when Isaac said he met someone? Had Jackson thought a girlfriend maybe? But if it was a girlfriend, wouldn't Jackson have been proud? Isaac shook his head, breaking the realm of his thoughts, maybe Jackson was just busy in class.

The bell rang, signalling the end of class, and Isaac texted Jackson again, this time just a question mark. He was looking down at his phone, when he felt someone hovering over him. He was surprised to see Jackson, inches from his face.

"My phone got taken until tomorrow," he explained, breathing heavily.

"It's okay. Was everything alright with you and Erica? You were acting a little strange…" Jackson frowned.

"Yeah, sure? Nothing's wrong…what? No, I mean…is she okay?" Jackson was stumbling over his words, obviously unsure on how he should answer the question.

"She has epilepsy," Isaac explained, fidgeting with his phone. Jackson opened his mouth to speak again, but Isaac cut in. "But don't talk about it, okay? She doesn't really have many friends because of it, and I think we can be her friends?" Jackson nodded slowly, like he wasn't quite sure he wanted to be Erica's friend.

"I have to go to practise, but I'll see you tomorrow, okay?" With that, Jackson was gone, running off in the opposite direction.

Isaac had a weird feeling that Jackson didn't like Erica, he couldn't figure out why though.

As promised, they saw each other the next morning. Isaac briefly noticed a look of relief on Jackson's face when he showed up alone, and again, it shook Isaac. They talked about nothing of real importance, all the way until the bell rang. Just hearing Jackson's voice made Isaac happy, but he didn't understand why.

He sat with Erica again at lunch (mainly because they had the class period before together) but this time Jackson didn't join them. Isaac waited patiently all lunch for the boy to show up, but he never did. It annoyed him slightly, that he may have something against Erica, but then he remembered Jackson did have other friends.

The next few weeks passed just like that, Isaac and Jackson would talk most mornings, but he never joined them for lunch again. Erica seemed to become more introverted, and Isaac noticed a lot of kids gave her weird looks, or talked about her crudely.

Mid-October, Isaac started to notice kids hung around him less as well, and seeing Jackson in the morning was becoming a rare occasion.

Isaac was at Jackson's house one evening (a rare night when his dad was out) when he decided to bring it up.

"Is there something wrong with me?" Jackson dropped his controller to look at Isaac.

"What are you talking about? Wrong with you?"

"I mean like, with Erica. People are rude to her, and now kids avoid me because I'm friends with her." Jackson shrugged.

"She's just not cool, Isaac. She's weird and-" He stopped talking when he realised Isaac was glaring at him.

"So I'm not cool enough for you?" Isaac's voice was becoming sharp. Jackson sighed.

"Isaac, I don't mean it like that. I'm just popular, you know? It doesn't make sense for me to hang out with people that aren't…"

"And you can't hang out with me because I'm not a douche to other kids? Because I'm one of those weird kids with problems?" Tears started pooling in Isaac's eyes, and he hastily wiped them away.

"No! But you have Erica, I have Danny and Greenberg and the other guys on the team. I'm apart of a team, so I'm friends with them, okay? Isaac, you're one of my best friends, there's just a difference between school friends and home friends." Isaac nodded, although he really didn't want to. Why couldn't school friends be the same as home friends? Isaac cursed himself for not being good at sports or video games, he knew Jackson would be friends with him at school if he was.

"I don't even want to be friends with your friends," Isaac mumbled. Jackson cleared his throat.

"So, are you and Erica…dating?"

"What?" So maybe that was the reason Jackson didn't like her? "No, no…"

"Oh," Isaac could say Jackson sounded relieved, but he was probably just making it up. "Do you like her?"

"No! I mean yes, as a friend. I don't want to, and I'm not going to, date her," he tried to clarify.

"Okay, cool," he again, sounded slightly relieved, but like he was trying to poorly cover it up.

Isaac went home shortly after, running over the conversation in his mind. Jackson had definitely seemed relieved that he wasn't dating Erica, but why? He didn't want to read into it, but somehow his mind kept circling back.


	11. Chapter 11

Christmas break came faster than ever, and Isaac worried over it. He had no way of going Christmas shopping, unless Jackson took him, and even then, he had no money. He knew Jackson would be getting him something again, and he wanted to be able to return the favour.

Jackson had given him a _phone_, and he couldn't even afford to buy the guy a candy bar in return.

Of course, Christmas came, just like it always did. Isaac sat in his room, staying out of his father's way as best he could, Christmas was his roughest time. But as hard as he tried, he still managed to mess things up, and he was once again in the basement, being locked in the freezer.

And he thought to himself, 'this time, I'll be okay, I'll be able to stay calm,' but just like every other time, he lost his cool after an expansive five minutes. He started to kick, and claw, and punch his way through, to no avail. He used all of his force, all of his willpower, but he was trapped.

He passed out eventually, and reawakened a few hours later, but it might as well been a few seconds. He tried pushing up again, and the top flew open. He threw himself out, struggling to catch a breath. He lay on the ground for a few minutes, breathing deeply, and trying to gather his wits.

He made his way back upstairs, praying his dad had left. With the coast clear, he made his way back to his bedroom to retrieve his phone. He had three texts from Jackson.

**Received from Jackson 9.34: **

**_Happy Christmas! Can u come over today?_**

**Received from Jackson 10.57**

**_Did u get my last text? Come over when u can._**

**Received from Jackson 1.24**

**_Are u ok? I will come over if u don't reply soon._**

Isaac quickly checked the time, it was five to two, he hoped Jackson hadn't come over while his dad was still home. He pulled on some jeans and grabbed his coat before running over to Jackson's.

He knocked on the door, hoping one of Jackson's relatives wouldn't answer. He realised it would have been smart to actually text Jackson back.

**To Jackson 2.03**

**_Sorry. I am okay. At your house right now._**

The door flew open, and Jackson was standing behind it, wearing shorts and an oversized red Christmas sweater.

"I seriously thought you were dead!" Isaac rolled his eyes.

"Happy Christmas?" Jackson smiled.

"Whatever, come upstairs." He grabbed Isaac's wrist, leading him upstairs. Jackson's touch spread warmth throughout Isaac's whole body, something he couldn't understand. He knew how to get to Jackson's room, he didn't understand why he had to be led there every time he came over.

Jackson sat him down on the bed, and then told him to close his eyes, to which he obliged. Jackson grabbed his hand, to which he slightly jumped. Then he placed a small object on Isaac's palm. Isaac opened his eyes to look at it, he scrunched his eyebrows.

"It's a sim card," Jackson explained. "So you have your own number…my parents are cancelling my old one- the one you're using- so now you have one to keep."

"But…who's paying for it?"

"I am, I have a bank account I linked it to," Jackson shrugged, focusing on an object on the opposite side of the room. Isaac shook his head.

"No way, no, Jackson. I can't let you do that, I don't need a phone, alright?" Isaac tried to give the chip back to Jackson, but he wouldn't accept it.

"No, it's a present, you can't reject it."

"I can't even afford to get you something Jackson, it's not fair!" Isaac was on the verge of tears, he couldn't cry about this. Jackson sat down next to him.

"Isaac, I don't expect anything, alright? Do you think I need anything? I don't want anything, but you need a phone, I need to be able to stay in contact with you, alright? It's just like last time, you don't have to use it for anything other than texting me, but you're taking it." Isaac shook his head, he couldn't accept it, but Jackson was definitely not taking no for an answer.

"I can't ever repay you enough for this, Jackson…" Jackson smiled.

"You don't need to, it's a gift."

"So why isn't your house exploding with relatives this year?" Isaac changed the subject.

"It's not our year to host, it's my aunts, and she's having the party tomorrow," Jackson explained, gritting his teeth.

"Not looking forward to it?"

"I know you love Christmas, but it's literally worse than hell." Isaac smiled, imagining Jackson having to take care of a bunch of screaming kids. "Do you wanna see the tree?" Isaac jumped at that, nodding eagerly.

They walked downstairs together, and into the dining room where the tree sat. Jackson ran to turn on the lights, and it glowed magnificently. Like the previous year, there were many different coloured lights, all complementing each other perfectly. And of course, the angel on top.

Isaac smiled widely, and he noticed Jackson was smiling too, not at the tree, but at him.

"As good as last years?"

"Just as," Isaac replied.

—-

Christmas break sped by, and soon they were back at school. Jackson seemed to be ignoring him more than ever while at school, but he made up for it after. He had forced Isaac to binge watch the first five season of Lost, so he could be up-to-date for the sixth season premiere, so they were literally together every time Jackson didn't have practise.

Isaac didn't care much for the show, he actually didn't understand half of it, but if it meant he was spending everyday with Jackson, he didn't really care. After a while, the fact that being with Jackson made him happy stopped worrying him, because it was normal to like being with someone so much, right?

Isaac also spent a lot more time with Erica, he even ended up getting invited over to her house, which he was completely unsure about. In the end, he agreed.

After school one Friday, he took the bus home to Erica's house. She was slightly nervous the whole time, which made Isaac even more nervous, but he tried not to show it.

After being at Erica's for two hours, Isaac wondered why she was ever okay. Erica was the oldest of five, the other four all being under the age of seven. Her mom, while trying to be cheery for Isaac, had obviously never had time to herself in well over five years. Her dad wasn't there the whole visit, Isaac assumed he was working, and Erica had to constantly leave Isaac to deal with her little siblings.

He was ashamed to say he was glad to get out of there, but he couldn't understand how someone could live in such chaos. Erica's mom drove him home, having to bring all the kids with her, and he thanked her an immense amount of times.

He wanted to go over to Jackson's, and tell him everything, but he decided against it. He couldn't be sure that Jackson may say something to his other friends. Isaac trusted Jackson with his life, but he wasn't sure about trusting him with anyone else's. It was like Jackson only cared about Isaac, and what directly affected Isaac, nothing else.

—

Lacrosse season started, and Isaac was unable to see Jackson a lot after school, but they were still able to meet weekly for the new episodes of Lost. And that was all Isaac really had to look forward to for the spring. He honestly didn't even care about the show, they were six episodes in to the season and he still couldn't figure out what was happening. That may have been due to the fact that half the show he was concentrating on Jackson, but he disregarded that fact. It wasn't like he was trying to stare at the guy, but the way Jackson was so invested in the show, how he reacted to every little thing, and freaked out over one plot twist, it was mesmerising to Isaac.

The days grew warmer, Isaac slowly got taller, and suddenly it was spring break. Isaac was only fourteen, so he didn't assume he would actually be doing anything for spring break, and it's not like his dad would let him.

Erica was the first to ask him, she was going down to the beach with her family and asked Isaac to join; he politely declined the offer.

Jackson was rapidly talking of his plans, he and Danny were also going down to the beach to surf, which Jackson was ecstatic about. Of course he didn't invite Isaac, and Isaac didn't expect him to.

Spring break was boring, which in Isaac's case, was good. Boring meant normal, boring meant nothing exciting happened, but it also meant nothing traumatising happened, and Isaac didn't know how he could cope without Jackson. It was starting to worry Isaac, that he basically relied on Jackson to be there to catch him, but he couldn't cope on his own anymore.

Jackson texted him everyday of the break, not entirely long messages, but just to check up on him. In the past, Isaac would have been annoyed by such gestures, claiming he didn't need help, or to be treated like a baby, but now it just filled him with a strange warmth, something he couldn't quite explain.


	12. Chapter 12

Jackson and Danny were driving home from the beach. They were both in the backseat, in an intense game of Assassins' Creed. Danny killed Jackson, and Jackson leaned over, punching Danny in the chest. He went back to his game, starting another round. Danny started making weird strangling noises.

"Real funny, Danny. C'mon, start the game!" Jackson turned to Danny, who was clutching his chest. "Danny?" Jackson's voice faltered, as he realised something may actually be wrong. "Mom!" Jackson's mom swerved off to the side of the road, seeing Danny in her rearview mirror.

"Jackson what happened?" She made her way to the backseat, unbuckling Danny and supporting his back. Jackson jumped out of the car and ran around the Danny's side.

"I-I don't know! I didn't mean to do anything! I-" His voice broke as he realised he had caused it.

"Okay, we're taking him to hospital, get back in the car." His mom hastily strapped Danny back in and then herself. They sped to Beacon Hills Memorial, doubling the speed limit on the way.

She lifted Danny from the car and carried him in, Jackson on her heels.

"He needs medical assistance now!" Danny was having a fit of some sort, struggling to breathe properly. A nurse helped Danny down onto a gurney and they wheeled him into another room. Jackson watched in horror, had he just killed his best friend?

They weren't allowed access to Danny's room, they had to go straight through with some procedure Jackson couldn't catch the name of. He sat in the waiting room, biting his nails and staring at the clock.

Danny's parents showed up some time later, his mother sobbing and father trying to stay calm, but obviously scared to death. Jackson watch as his mom conversed with them, out of ears reach. He watched as a doctor came out, he was explaining things fast, his hands moving around. Jackson strained to hear, but it was impossible.

Danny's parents started to relax, they were nodding, responding to the questions the doctor seemed to be giving; they talked for almost an hour. Eventually, they made their way over to Jackson.

"Jackson, we need to know if anything happened to Danny." The tone of his mothers voice made his skin crawl.

"I just whacked him! Not even hard I swear! He's gotten hurt more in lacrosse! I didn't know this would happen, I swear! Is he dying?" Jackson broke, letting himself cry over the matter, something he was refraining from doing. Mrs Mahaelani sat down next to Jackson, wrapping an arm around him.

"Honey, it's not your fault, we swear. You couldn't have know anything was going to happen, okay?" Jackson nodded, wiping his nose.

"Is he going to be okay?" She nodded, squeezing his shoulder.

"He's just gone into surgery, he'll be fine." Jackson's eyes grew wide. Surgery? For what? "He was born with misshapen cartilage in his chest," she calmly explained. "It was always a matter, but it didn't seem to affect him until now. When you hit him, it shifted, crushing his lungs in the process." Jackson looked terrified, he had caused his best friend to stop breathing.

"I did that…" He was talking more to himself, but Mrs Mahaelani answered.

"No, we always knew it was a possibility, it could have happened to him at anytime, especially now he's growing." Jackson continued shaking his head, it felt as if they were just making up excuses.

"Why's he in surgery?" Jackson eventually asked, breaking the silence.

"He's getting a metal bar put in his chest, to support his sternum. It's going to keep the cartilage straight, and more importantly, off his lungs." Jackson nodded, rubbing his eyes.

"Can I see him?"

"Oh not right now, sweetie." This time it was his mom who responded.

"He's in surgery, it's closed to visitors," Mrs Mahaelani continued. "We can see him tomorrow, after he's rested.

"Come on, Jackson, let's go." His mom reached for his wrist, but Jackson pulled back.

"I want to stay here."

"You're not staying here, nothing is happening, you won't be missing anything, let's go." She was forceful, grabbing onto Jackson's wrist. Jackson pulled back again, and stared his mother down.

"I'm not leaving my best friend You can go, but I'm staying here." After a long moment of glaring, she sighed, giving up the matter.

"Okay, I'll see you in the morning." And just like that, she was gone. Jackson was surprised as to how easily she gave in, but maybe on some level she realised how Jackson felt; completely and totally responsible.

The found it impossible to fall asleep, he didn't understand how anyone could in a hospital. It smelled weird, there were strange noises constantly going off, and the lights seemed to be on twenty-four-seven. He was also trying to sleep in a chair, which was definitely not helping.

He decided to take a stroll through the halls at three in the morning. He walked almost ever inch of the place, absently strolling, peering into rooms occasionally.

Jackson made his way back to his original seats around half past four, he passed out shorty after.

—-

He was awoken to his mom shaking him, holding a breakfast sandwich close to his face. He greedily took it, thanking her halfway through the chewing process. She updated him with Danny. He was recovering from surgery, they could see him in an hour, he was doing great.

As exciting as it was, Jackson was nervous to see Danny. What if Danny blamed him? (Which Jackson thought he should) What if he didn't want to be friends with Jackson anymore? Jackson shook his head, he wouldn't do that, it was Danny. His best friend.

He fiddled with his phone, rolling it over his hands nervously. He saw Danny's parents turn the corner to enter the wing, he wondered if they had already seen him, they were obviously not entering the building for the first time that day. Jackson perked up as they approached, but he held his tongue.

They passed by, following a nurse to a reception desk. He knew they were talking about hospital bills. Jackson prayed his parents had offered to pitch in, hell, pay for it all, and take it out of Jackson's college fund.

The hour was brutal, but eventually, a nurse came out to allow Jackson into the room. He hesitantly followed her, constantly glancing back over his shoulder, looking for an excuse not to follow through.

And he saw Danny, propped up in the hospital bed, looking half dead, Jackson stopped in his tracks. Danny gave him a lopsided smile and the nurse left them alone.

"Danny I am so sorry! I can't believe I-" Danny held out his hand, to stop Jackson from speaking.

"Dude, I thought they already explained it to you. If it hadn't been you, it would have been someone else, it was going to happen no matter what." Jackson signed, it felt a lot more genuine coming from Danny's mouth.

"You seem way too cheerful for someone who just came out of surgery," Jackson commented.

"I get the next three days off of school! What's not to be happy about?"

"The fact that you have a metal bar in your body?" Jackson mumbled. Danny rolled his eyes.

"It's kinda cool, I have metal - like inside of me. We have to go through airport security with it, seriously." Jackson couldn't understand how Danny was being so carefree about it all, but maybe that meant Jackson was just totally overreacting?

"Sure," Jackson replied, trying to sound cheerful. "We'll go to my house in Florida this summer."

"You have a house in Florida?" Danny almost leapt from the bed. "Why aren't I made aware of these things? You have to promise we'll go!" Jackson genuinely laughed.

"Seriously? Florida is boring, the beaches are ten times better here!"

"But Disney World!" Danny argued, crossing his arms and pouting. Jackson rolled his eyes.

"Fine," he agreed, trying to sound annoyed, but he was smiling.

He stayed with Danny for the rest of the day, but was forced to go home for dinner, as he had school the next day, unlike Danny. Jackson felt a lot more comfortable leaving Danny alone there, now that he had talked to Danny after the surgery, and he was sure to be okay.

He realised on the car ride home that he hadn't texted Isaac all day. He went to compose a message, but his phone was flat. He had to wait until eight, as his parents wanted him to stay downstairs and help with dinner. As soon as he was excused, he raced to put his phone on charge. He didn't know why he was so desperate to text Isaac, he assumed it was just so he wouldn't forget.

He hoped Isaac wasn't annoyed with the daily text messages, because he knew Isaac would be too polite to say as much. Isaac texting him back was one of his favourite things, it let him know he was okay, that he was able to properly respond. He would have liked better to call Isaac, but that would be a lot more difficult. He didn't even know if his Isaac's father knew he owned a cell phone. He also wasn't sure if Isaac would be able to hold a phone conversation. Their talks in person were based mostly on Jackson paying attention to Isaac's body language and expressions to figure out what he wanted. And that wasn't Isaac's fault, he just has a hard time saying what he does and doesn't want.

His phone turned on, but Jackson realised he had no idea what he was even going to say. Should he tell Isaac about Danny? No, that would be way too long of a text. In the end, he ended up going with,

**To Isaac 8.13**

**_School tomorrow :-/_**

He retreated to his bathroom to brush his teeth, and when he was done, he had a text.

**Received from Isaac 8.15**

**_Don't give emoticons noses, it looks weird._**

Jackson laughed, okay then.

**To Isaac 8.16**

**_Sorry. Is this better? - :/_**

**Received from Isaac 8.17**

**_Much, thank you. _**

Texting Isaac always made Jackson smile, he didn't know why, but whatever they were texting about didn't matter, it was just that it was Isaac. And queue the definitely gay thoughts, which were starting to really freak him out.

He swore to himself, he really needed to talk to Danny about it. But what would he say? 'Hey Danny, do you ever start thinking about what it would be like to throw your friend up against a wall and go down on him?' Yeah, definitely not something he would be admitting out loud, especially to his best friend.

He tried to clear his head, but he just couldn't. He tried to think about girls, they're attractive too, not everything has to be centred on Isaac. But the truth was, he hadn't ever had a crush on a girl. Sure, he found girls on the internet hot, but he couldn't even get off to that without Isaac popping into his mind, which was totally fucked up. It wasn't his fault none of the girls in his school were attractive to him, certainly high school girls would be more attractive, more dateable.


	13. Chapter 13

Isaac seemed to be the only kid not dreading the return back to school, but how could he? He got to see Jackson (even if it was only from afar) and Erica again, he got to be away from his house for seven hours, and he had something to do other than lounge around the house.

He met up with Erica before school, she told him about her trip to the beach, with very little detail. Isaac didn't have much to share, he had just sat at home and waited for texts from Jackson. Thankfully, his dad had been occupied with work for most of the break.

He hadn't seen Jackson at all, not even hanging with the crowd of lacrosse kids, he tried not to think about it. The day passed on, and still no Jackson. At two, Isaac decided to send him a text.

**To Jackson 2.01**

**_Are you even at school?_**

**Received from Jackson 2.02**

**_Yep. Just not hanging out with those guys today. How did u notice i was missing?_**

Isaac grew red, although Jackson wasn't even talking to him directly, he could feel the humorous mock in the text.

**To Jackson 2.04**

**_Just saw them messing around and didn't see you._**

He figured that was a smooth enough answer, and definitely better than, 'I was trying to look for you,' way better. Jackson didn't reply after that, Isaac hoped that was a good sign, or he just got his phone taken away again. Jackson texted him back around three.

**Received from Jackson 2.58**

**_Whatever u say. Come over tmrw earlier. k?_**

Isaac grinned stupidly, tomorrow was Lost night, he almost forgot. He responded with a simple, 'k'.

He didn't actually see Jackson that day, he just texted him like he had all of spring break, but they got hours together tomorrow, so, in Isaac's mind, it made up for it. He wondered why Jackson wanted him to come over early, it was probably just to hang out, but the question fluttered around in his mind.

School went by slower than normal, in Isaac's mind at least. When the final bell rang, he raced to Jackson's classroom. They almost collided.

"In a hurry?" Jackson laughed, pocketing his mobile. Isaac shifted his weight between feet, pulling on his backpack. "Are you coming on the bus with me?" Isaac looked up hopefully and nodded, falling into step with Jackson.

They walked to the bus, Jackson complaining about english homework and his teacher.

It's only a five minute trip from the school, which is why Isaac opts for walking, he wonders why there is even a bus route for their street. Apparently he does so aloud, as Jackson spends the whole journey explaining why they do have a bus.

Jackson jumped from the bus, skipping all of the step. Isaac wondered why he was in such a good mood, and made a mental note to ask. They walked the remaining few metres to Jackson's door. Isaac made a quick glance at his house, double-checking his father was at work.

"You want ice cream?" Jackson asked, turning in a circle and launching his backpack across the foyer. Isaac shrugged, setting his bag on the ground and removing his shoes. "I'll take that as a yes."

Isaac trailed after Jackson, who was quite literally _skipping_ into the kitchen. "Why are you so happy?" Isaac asked the question quietly and at the ground.

"It's Lost night!" Jackson replied, pulling open the freezer.

"But you're never _this_ excited for it." Jackson shrugged, tossing a tub of vanilla ice cream on the counter. "And nothing even happened last episode, it made no sense!"

"It only made no sense because you've barely been paying attention!" Jackson retorted, fumbling around in a drawer. "And yeah, Desmond ran into Sayid, remember?" He looked up at Isaac, who shot him a confused look.

"Is that a good thing or a bad thing" Jackson rolled his eyes.

"I know you're there, you're sitting right next to me! How can you miss all of this?" Isaac shrugged, not wanting to admit he didn't even have his eyes on the TV half the time. Jackson scooped outrageously large portions of ice cream into each bowl. "Want chocolate sauce?" He held it upside down, banging on the bottom.

"Sure." Jackson nodded, proceeding to drown the ice cream in the syrup. Isaac had to snatch the bowl away before it was nothing but chocolate sauce. "You're supposed to be able to see the ice cream," Isaac quipped. Jackson grinned at him, pouring more sauce on his own than he had on Isaac's. Jackson handed Isaac a spoon and led him into the living room.

"So why are we having ice cream?"

"For Lost day," Jackson replied simply, cramming his mouth with ice cream.

"We've never had ice cream before," Isaac commented, taking a bite. "There is seriously way too much chocolate in this." Jackson swallowed and stuck out his tongue.

"Why do you have to question my choices? Would you rather be at home eating carrots and doing homework?"

"Touché." Jackson turned on the TV, and left it muted on a day time show Isaac didn't recognise. They finished their ice cream and Isaac cleaned up while Jackson ran upstairs.

Isaac was settled on the couch when Jackson came back downstairs, he was holding a box. Isaac raised an eyebrow.

"So my dad has a firm in London, when he comes back he brings me awesome candy."

"We just had ice cream." Jackson rolled his eyes and opened the box. He handed Isaac a skinny chocolate bar. "Flake?" Isaac unwrapped it and took a bite. "It's just chocolate, Jackson." Jackson frowned.

"It's really good chocolate!" He argued, eating another candy bar from the box. Isaac pursed his lips, it just tasted like normal chocolate. He wondered if it was the fact Jackson's dad had thought about him while overseas, and had brought it back specifically for Jackson, had anything to do with Jackson hyping the chocolate up so much.

Isaac watched Jackson stare at the contents of the box for awhile, he had a sad smile on his face, Isaac wasn't sure what to do. Suddenly, Jackson jumped up, placing the box on the seat next to him.

"Three hours until Lost, you wanna play lacrosse?" Isaac made a face and shook his head. "Come on, don't you wanna play in high school?"

"Why would I want to play? I can't catch and I duck every time the ball comes towards me."

"It's 'cause you don't practise," Jackson argued. Isaac shook his head again and Jackson dropped the subject.

"Why did you want me to come over earlier?" Isaac broke the silence, causing Jackson's head to snap up.

"Just to hang out, I didn't see you all break or anything." Isaac smiled, Jackson had missed him on some level, maybe even the level Isaac had missed Jackson.

"You can invite me over whenever you want," Isaac mumbled the words slightly, causing them to run together. Jackson shrugged, kicking at the carpet.

"I just don't have a lot of time, lacrosse and school." Isaac nodded, but they were in eighth grade, how much time was school taking up for Jackson. "I have to practise a lot, so I can make it on the team." He almost sounded worried, like he didn't think he had a chance, but his drive was intimidating.

"You're amazing…at lacrosse. You're going to make the team, give yourself a break." Jackson smiled, but it was an uneasy one.

They played video games for a bit, and then re-watched last week's episode, so Jackson could explain everything to Isaac. He thought he had an okay concept of the episode by the time they got through it, but if the episodes were staying in line with the previous ones, Isaac could bet that tonight's would have slight to do with last week's.

Isaac was right, of course. The episode started with a bunch of pictures and videos of one of the characters, while a man talked about what the man had done. Isaac didn't understand what was going on, but he was correct to assume it was the alternate reality - or whatever.

Isaac turned to Jackson, who was biting on his right thumb nail, watching intently; Isaac didn't think it was that interesting. He switched between watching Jackson, and watching the show; Jackson was ten times more interesting.

Suddenly, Michael appeared. Isaac _knew_ that guy was dead. He opened his mouth to confirm his suspicions, but Jackson clamped a hand over Isaac's mouth at the first word. Isaac reared his head back, but Jackson's hand went with it. Was this how they were going to watch the rest of the show?

It cut to commercial and Jackson pulled his hand away. "You can't talk, remember?"

"Yeah, yeah, but he's dead right?" Jackson nodded his head, mumbling in agreement. "And he's the one that can talk to the ghosts?"

"Yep." Isaac nodded, and decided against anymore questions. The show came back and a ghost chat ensued, before cutting back to the parallel universe.

A girl appeared on the screen and Jackson made a weird noise, biting down on his thumb. Isaac frowned slightly, trying to figure out her significance. He watched Jackson. He watched Jackson's facial expressions throughout the scene, and the way he bit at the skin around his non-existent fingernail.

There was an explosion on the TV and Isaac's head snapped towards it, then to Jackson. His eyes were wide and he was sitting up straight, Isaac tried not to smile.

Throughout the hour, Jackson had gone through a roller coaster of expressions and positions. Sometimes he would slowly shake his head, other times he would nod in agreement, but mostly he was biting his thumb. He would be sitting up straight, and moments later, lying down, taking up the whole couch.

Isaac wished the episodes were longer, because he could watch Jackson like that all day. It wasn't rare to see Jackson invested in something, as he became obsessed easily, but it was rare to see him so emotionally invested, it was something he had never seen before Wednesday nights. Isaac wondered if that was the reason Danny wasn't the one who joined Jackson for the new episodes.

—

The next few episodes were almost as confusing as the ones before, but Isaac was starting to understand some of the show, at least he thought he was.

School was getting easier, as the end of the year was approaching, so Isaac payed little attention to his classes, and a lot more attention to Jackson. Jackson was inviting him over more often, even if it was just to play video games. The best days were those when Jackson's mom was able to take them places.

Isaac learned Jackson loved to bowl, something he never would have guessed. He was great, compared to Isaac at least. They went to the bowling alley three times in May, Jackson trying to improve Isaac's scores.

The week before the finale of Lost, Jackson was having trouble staying calm. Isaac couldn't understand why he was so hyper, why he was freaking out over a TV show. Jackson explained that it was the last episode, ever. Everything was going to be explained, but Isaac didn't even know what that meant.

Jackson had a mandatory lacrosse practise after school that Wednesday, so Isaac didn't get to his house until five. Jackson was drinking a Red Bull and bouncing when he opened the door. Isaac cocked his head slightly, smiling at the sight.

Jackson made him re-watch last weeks episode, even though he had been there for it the week before.

The new episode started and Isaac was shushed before opening his mouth. Jackson was sitting up straight and leaning forward, threatening to fall off the couch. Isaac sat back, it was a two-hour-long episode.

In that two hours, a lot of stuff happened. Isaac couldn't tell you want it actually was, but based on Jackson's facial expressions and noises, he knew a lot had happened. When the show faded to black one last time, Jackson sat motionless, his jaw slightly hanging, and his eyes blank.

Isaac stared at him for a long time, until finally speaking. "Did they explain anything?" Jackson looked at him and frowned.

"I don't understand what happened. What was the ending?" Isaac looked back at him, even more confused. Jackson was supposed to tell _Isaac _what had just happened, not vice versa. Before Isaac could even say anything, Jackson continued.

"They didn't…what…" Jackson looked broken, Isaac wished he had actually looked at the TV more than once, otherwise he may be able to try and make up a reason, but he was more clueless than Jackson.

Jackson groaned and fell backwards, collapsing into the couch. "I wasted…so much time…this isn't how it should have ended!" Isaac was feeling a little uneasy, Jackson's voice was starting to get harsh and cold.

"Jackson, I'm sorry." Jackson blinked and stared at Isaac.

"For what?" Isaac shrugged, pulling his knees up to his chest.

"That I can't explain what happened. Do you want me to go?" Jackson's face went from confused-frustration to almost shocked.

"What? No, don't leave. It's - don't apologise, it's just a show." Their eyes met, Isaac nodded. "D'ya want dinner or something?" Isaac shrugged, he hated eating all of Jackson's food and never returning the favour.

Jackson leapt off the couch, shaking his head slightly. He disappeared into the kitchen.

They ate cereal for dinner. Isaac left before nine, managing to get home just before his dad. Things had been good with him lately, he was having good days at work, and Isaac had kept up with all his chores and school work, as long as things at work stayed alright, he could go another week without a scratch.


	14. Chapter 14

A soon as summer hit, Danny and Jackson left. Jackson felt bad about not being able to see Isaac for a whole month, but he promised he would make up the lost time.

They had a flight out to Florida at eight in the morning, which meant they were waking up at five in order to get out the door, pick up Danny, and get to the airport for checking bags and security lines.

Jackson's dad hadn't managed to get time off work, so it was just his mom taking the two of them, but it's not like they planned on hanging out with his parents anyway, so he didn't really care his dad wasn't coming.

It was a five hour flight, in which Danny and Jackson played a lot of PSP. They lost five hours to the flight, and three hours due to the time difference, which meant it was already nearing five in the afternoon when they got to the house.

Jackson showed Danny around the house, they chucked their luggage into Jackson's room, and abandoned the house. They walked down to the beach, which was slowly being abandoned by families and overrun by teenagers as the sun descended.

"Kinda a crappy beach," Danny commented, kicking at a can.

"Yeah, well we're in Florida, not California. It's a nice beach for swamp land." Jackson retorted.

"I kinda meant like the litter and crowds of people hanging around?" Danny pointed at a group of guys pushing each other into the crashing waves. Jackson chuckled.

"That's the point!" Danny gave him a quizzical look. "That's us!"

"Jackson, those guys are at least eighteen, we're fourteen. Are you planning on drinking?" Jackson gave Danny a 'no duh' look.

"We can pass for sixteen, no problem."

"What about lacrosse?"

"It's alcohol, Danny. Alcohol doesn't impair lacrosse playing." Danny was still frowning, Jackson elbowed him in the ribs. "Lighten up!"

"Have you ever even drunk alcohol before?"

"That's why you're here," Jackson responded as if it were the most obvious response in the world, "So we can do it together." Danny's frown deepened, but he didn't comment any further. "C'mon." Jackson pulled Danny farther down the beach.

"We're not talking to those guys, right?" Danny was motioning at the drunk college kids from before.

"No, high schoolers hang out down here." He ended up practically dragging Danny through the sand.

They got to the other side of the beach, were a bunch of kids were gathered around a bonfire, cans in their hands. They acknowledged Jackson as he got closer.

"You live here?" One of the older-looking guys asked.

"California, got a beach house down here." The guy nodded and motioned for them to join.

"How old are you guys?"

"Sixteen." The same guy nodded and motioned to another a guy with a scruffy beard across the circle.

"Rising juniors?" Jackson nodded and elbowed Danny, who had been silently observing, to do the same. "Wanna beer?" A third guy tossed two cans their way before they even replied. Jackson caught them both and tossed one in Danny's lap, who looked at him uneasily.

"Ease up," Jackson hissed at his best friend. Jackson popped the tab and took a sip, it was more bitter than he had expected, but he continued drinking. He was surprised it had been so easy to actually get alcohol. It was a private beach, not as easy to access as the others, and there were barely cops ever around, Jackson knew that much, but he hadn't expected his story to be bought so easily. Yeah, he looked older than he was, but Danny didn't really, he assumed they just thought he looked young for his age.

He glanced around at the faces in the circle. It wasn't dark yet, so it was easy to see everything. Other than the three guys they were talking to, there were about ten other people; half girls, half boys. A couple was making out off to the side of the fire, and the others were drinking and laughing. Isaac flooded Jackson's mind and he chugged the drink to rid himself of the boy. This month would be Isaac-free, he was starting to think about Isaac so much it was unhealthy, the blue-eyed-boy was practically on his mind 24/7. It wasn't like he wanted him to be, every time he saw a couple he thought of himself and Isaac, which wasn't okay in any way.

Jackson snapped himself out of his thoughts and looked at Danny. He was tapping nervously on the can, which was still sealed, and staring at the group of kids.

"You guys all live here?" Jackson asked the guy that had invited them to sit. He shook his head.

"Naw, I live in New York. Couple of the guys over there live here, but everyone else is on vacation or something." Jackson nodded, taking another sip. He wondered if they had all just met, or came down here every summer. Jackson nodded again, chugged the beer in his hand, and grabbed a new one.

The next thing Jackson remembers is waking up in his bed. He shot up and then cursed loudly, his head pounding. He wiped his eyes and squinted at the alarm clock on his bedside table, it was already midday and he felt like shit.

Jackson tried to recall last nights events, but the last thing he remembered was talking to the first guy they met about the beer. Then he remembered Danny, Danny would remember for him.

He pulled himself out of bed and went to the guest room. The door was wide open and no one was inside. Jackson groaned and held his head. The next step was to check his phone. He stumbled back to his room, fumbling around for his phone (which had somehow ended up under the bed).

He goes straight to his texts with Danny, but there had been nothing since the previous morning when Jackson had texted him to say they were on their way to his house. He shot him a new text.

**To Danny 12.13**

**_Where r u? What happened last nite?_**

Jackson decided to check texts with anyone else for clues as to what happened, it was like playing detective. His texts with Isaac were at the top of messages, Jackson groaned.

**To Isaac 12.12pm**

**_12.12, mak a wish_**

**Received from Isaac 12.13**

**_Pretty sure it's supposed to be at 11.11._**

**To Isaac 12.16pm**

**_What u wish for? _**

**Received from Isaac 12.17**

**_I didn't wish for anything, what about you?_**

**To Isaac 12.19pm**

**_Come to Florida?_**

**Received from Isaac 12.20pm**

**_I can't, no money, no tickets, no parents to take me._**

Jackson sighed of relief, nothing embarrassing so far.

**To Isaac 2.03**

**_cum no plz? sorry_**

Jackson cringed, that text could easily mean two different things, and his spelling was appalling compared to two hours earlier; he assumed the night had only gotten worse.

**Received from Isaac 2.05**

**_Are you okay?_**

**To Isaac 2.15**

**_NO_**

**Received from Isaac 2.16**

**_Do you want to talk?_**

**Received from Isaac 2.28**

**_Jackson?_**

**Received from Isaac 2.57**

**_I need to sleep but are you okay?_**

**Received from Isaac 3.08**

**_Please text me when you wake up._**

**Received from Isaac 8.34**

**_Jackson please text me back._**

That got him nowhere, other than realising he had probably traumatised Isaac and definitely needed to text the boy back.

**To Isaac 12.22**

**_I am so sorry. I was fine. Hope i didn't wake u up or annoy u too much._**

He hadn't texted anyone else that night, and he praised himself for it. Danny still hadn't replied to his text, but he was probably just without his phone.

Jackson decided to venture downstairs, he prayed his mom was still clueless to how his night had gone, if she wasn't, he would be in for a hell of a lecture. The house was quiet, Jackson scanned the room, no one seemed to be home.

Jackson rummaged through the cabinets, finding a bottle of Aspirin and taking three. He also chugged a bottle of water, wincing as the cold liquid affected his head. He collapsed on the couch, worn out from having to wake up. He was drifting off when his phone buzzed.

**Received from Isaac 12.56**

**_Are you sure? What happened?_**

Jackson groaned, he still had no idea where Danny was or what happened, and he now had to figure out what to tell Isaac. He decided to ignore the text until he knew what happened for himself.

He's awoken by someone shaking his shoulders, he looks over his head and is relieved to see Danny. "Danny! What happened last night?" Instead of answering, Danny made a face that told him to shut up and he gestured to his right. Jackson spun around, almost falling off the couch when he sees his mother only a few feet away. "After I fell asleep…did you make it to your room okay?" He covered.

"Smooth," Danny whispered, thumping him on the head. Jackson hissed, throwing his hands up to rub his temples.

"Where were you?"

"At the beach with your mom, because you told me you felt sick this morning when you woke up, remember?" Jackson definitely did not remember, but he agreed anyway.

"Hey Danny come help me out upstairs, okay?" Jackson grabbed Danny's wrist and yanked him up the stairs. "What happened last night?" Jackson demanded, yelping as his head pounded.

"You don't remember? That's hilarious," Danny faked a laugh, eyes glaring at Jackson.

"Dude, I seriously don't! I'm sorry for whatever I did."

"You should be, you got so drunk you couldn't talk properly. You also started puking and I had to deal with that, then at four in the morning I had to carry you home and pull you all the way up the stairs! I also had to tuck you in because even while you were mostly unconscious, you still whined about having to be tucked into bed. Seriously?" Jackson grimaced, shrugging.

"Thank you, you are like the best friend ever—seriously." Danny rolled his eyes, flopping down on Jackson's bed.

"And don't worry, I told your mom we went to the beach and then the arcade, and that you ate something bad and were sick last night and that's why you were still sleeping." Jackson sighed of relief, he didn't know what he would do without Danny.

"What happened with those high schoolers?" Danny laughed.

"You made out with one of the girls for a long time." Jackson cursed under his breath, his first kiss and he didn't remember it. "Then you pushed her and said it was wrong and locked yourself in the bathroom."

"What? What time was that?" Danny thought for a moment.

"When you were really out of it, probably around two in the morning?" Jackson cringed, that explained the later texts with Isaac. So what, he had felt guilty about making out with the girl, because he had undecided gay feelings for his emotionally and physically abused friend, and had decided to lock himself in a bathroom because of it?

"How long was I in the bathroom?" Danny groaned.

"Dude I don't remember, a long time, like until three. Then you came out and you kinda just stumbled around. Most people left while you were in the bathroom. You muttered some stuff about being wrong and needing to talk to someone and then you threw up. That pretty much cleared out everyone else. Is that enough information?" It was Jackson's turn to groan, from embarrassment and pain.

"So we pretty much need to steer clear of those guys now, right?" Danny nodded.

"Yeah, definitely, I think they found out you weren't sixteen, and they definitely know that was your first time having alcohol." Jackson groaned and sat down next to Danny.

"I really screwed up," he sighed, falling down to his back. Danny agreed, which earned a punch from Jackson.

Although he screwed up the first day, Jackson and Danny enjoyed the rest of the trip. They spent one more week at the beach, avoiding high schoolers and alcohol, before heading up to Orlando for five days of Disney, and one a Universal. Danny was so excited about everything at Disney that Jackson actually enjoyed himself, which he didn't think he would. They went down to Miami for a week, and then spent another week at Jackson's before flying back home to Beacon Hills.


	15. Chapter 15

_A/N: Thanks for sticking with the story and leaving great reviews! It's about to get bumpy..._

Jackson had only landed an hour ago when he received a text from Isaac.

**Received from Isaac 7.56**

**_Are you back yet? _**

**To Isaac 7.57**

**_Just got home, r u ok?_**

**Received from Isaac 7.59**

**_Can we talk? I'll be there in two minutes._**

Jackson panicked slightly, he looked terrible, and he hadn't showered since the plane trip. He told himself it was just Isaac, Isaac had seen him way worse. But the more pressing thing was the matter of talking. What was so dire Isaac needed to talk about right away? Had Danny talked to Isaac about Florida?

He opened the door and Isaac stood there swaying on his feet, looking out of it.

"Isaac? Are you okay?" Isaac shrugged, staring at his feet. "Come upstairs." He led Isaac up the steps and into his bedroom. He paced nervously in front of Isaac, who was standing at the door, what was he going to say?

Isaac walked passed Jackson and sat down on his bed, he opened his mouth to talk, but instead collapsed, crying. It was strange to see him like this, the last time Isaac had fully broken down in front of Jackson had been over a year ago, Isaac was a half foot taller now, and looked five year older. Jackson stopped pacing and ran to sit down next to him. When he got there though, he was unsure of what to do, he put his arm around Isaac, squeezing his opposite shoulder.

"You'll be okay, I promise." What was he supposed to say when he didn't even know what was happening?

Isaac sniffed and looked at Jackson. Even with puffy red eyes, messed up hair, and his nose dribbling with snot, Jackson was still mesmerised by him. He mentally slapped himself for having those thoughts while the boy was in obvious pain, but it was hard to control them. He hadn't seen Isaac in almost a month, and it was starting to get to him.

Isaac swallowed hard. "I hate it. I hate crying in front of you," he choked on his words, struggling to hold back tears. Jackson shook his head.

"I love it." He realised how creepy that sounded, and hoped Isaac was too upset to register it. "I love that you come to me, I mean. Always keep coming to me, okay?" Isaac sniffed and nodded, Jackson tightened his grip around the boy's shoulders. Isaac sobbed and fell forward onto Jackson's chest, pulling him closer. This had never happened before, Jackson wasn't quite sure what to do, Isaac definitely had a no-touching rule.

Jackson felt his jeans tighten. Fuck, this was definitely not an okay time. Isaac was in pain, and all Jackson could think about was how close their bodies were, that Isaac had his head on Jackson's chest, and was burrowing himself closer. He closed his eyes, recalling everything he knew had happened to Isaac in his short life, everything his dad did to him. It was really the only solution Jackson had, get horny, get mad instead.

He really shouldn't be angry when Isaac was like this, he knew he shouldn't, but it was his best shot. It was angry or horny, neither went well with upset.

"Isaac, what happened?" Jackson put his hand on Isaac's head, but he wasn't quite sure what to actually do with it, he just let it rest there. Isaac shook his head into Jackson's body, Jackson took a deep breath.

"Okay, but you're not hurt physically?" He shook his head again and Jackson released the breath he was holding. Of course, emotions were much harder to deal with than a scratch, but he knew Isaac could normally handle the physical stuff, so if he was crying, there would have to be some pretty huge scars.

Jackson had gone on autopilot, stroking Isaac's hair back off his face with his right hand, he had his left one of the small of Isaac's back, keeping Isaac close to him.

"You're safe here, always." Isaac coughed, trying to swallow.

"I don't…I don't know what I would do if you weren't here, I honestly don't," Isaac's voice broke and he began crying loudly. Jackson sighed, cradling Isaac, forcing to think about anything other than the fact that he was cradling Isaac. The boy was crying and Jackson still couldn't keep it together. He blamed hormones.

No matter how hard he tried, it was impossible to keep Isaac out of his brain. He could smell his hair, feel his body, hear his voice. He was overwhelmed, but he was in charge of Isaac. He couldn't just get up and walk away. Isaac was counting on him.

Jackson prayed Isaac was upset enough to not notice the bulge in his pants, or the pheromones he was so obviously giving off.

He was about to say something when Isaac pulled away from him to wipe his eyes, they were glossed over and looked vibrant. Jackson couldn't pull his gaze from the mesmerising blue colour.

He physically pinched himself, to try and focus on the problem and not the boy, but it was to no avail. No matter how hard Jackson tried, his train of thought always led to kissing Isaac, holding him and being able to have full contact with him; no boundaries.

With Isaac falling on him, digging his face into his shoulder, wrapping his arms around Jackson, it was just too much. And now Isaac was looking at him, his eyes glowing in the dim light. He was just — staring. Jackson wasn't sure what to do, what to say. He stared back, soaking up Isaac's status.

They were inches apart, Jackson's hand was still pressed against Isaac's back, and all he could think about was closing that gap between their bodies, between their lips. It became so overwhelming that he found himself in another state of mind, his body taking over. The gap was closed, Jackson's lips were pressed against Isaac's.

He felt Isaac freeze against him, and then he clamoured backwards, sliding off the bed. Jackson was frozen too, realising what he had just done. He bit down on his lip hard, unable to meet Isaac's eyes, he had fucked up; and he knew it.

_ —_

Isaac sat on the floor of Jackson's bedroom. He couldn't process what had just happened, he couldn't move, he couldn't breathe. His body was shaking, he couldn't blink. He attempted a deep, shaky breath, and forced his way onto his feet. Isaac stumbled slightly, but took this as an opportunity to run; so he ran. He ran as far as he could from Jackson's house, from the street, from the neighbourhood. He ran until he collapsed from exhaustion, and then he cried.

Hours passed and he remained in fetal position, tears never ceasing to pool in his eyes, and fall down his cheeks.

He couldn't even make sense of why he was crying, Jackson had kissed him. Jackson had kissed him. But it was Jackson, it didn't make sense; the day didn't make sense. Isaac pulled himself up to sit on the curb, he needed to go through what had happened. He had been crying, embarrassing himself in front of Jackson for the millionth time, when Jackson had just grabbed him and kissed him. There was no making sense of it, because there was no logic involved.

The only thing that made sense would have been the kiss was to make Isaac feel better. Jackson had somehow found out about Isaac's weird feelings towards him, and decided that was the only reason to calm him. Except, he knew Jackson better than that. Jackson knew how to calm him, he had been doing it for years. Kissing had never been apart of the equation, why would it be now?

He pressed his head in-between his knees, adding pressure to the growing headache. He couldn't face Jackson now, not now that he knew.

And then terrible thoughts clouded his mind. What if Jackson had done that to get rid of Isaac? To let him know he knew, to mock him; but would Jackson treat Isaac like that? Of course he was snarky and a bit rude to most people, but never to Isaac. Never. Had Jackson finally decided he had had enough? He was finally done with Isaac's constant problems and crying? For christ's sake he was fourteen. Maybe something had happened to Jackson in Florida, Isaac still wasn't clear on the whole texting incident.

Isaac was assuming faster than he was processing, causing him to break back down, releasing a wave of tears.

When he had finally gathered himself together, he decided the best course of action was to wait for Jackson. If Jackson texted him, he would text back. If Jackson talked to him, he would respond. If he didn't, it must be something big like Isaac assumed.

It took him another thirty minutes, but Isaac finally made his way home. Thankfully, his dad was still gone, probably would be all night. This would have been one of those situation when he would have gone over to Jackson's and stayed the night, but that was definitely off the table for the night.

Instead, Isaac stripped off his jeans and crawled into bed, passing out immediately. When he woke up, he instantly grabbed his phone, checking the screen. His heart sunk when he had no new messages, then again, the time read 3.41, so there was a chance Jackson had passed out like Isaac, and was just still asleep.

Isaac couldn't understand why he wanted Jackson to text him so badly. If he did, how would that conversation have to go, and how would it end?

No, Isaac decided he didn't want to talk to Jackson, anything he would respond with would be something Isaac couldn't handle, he would break down again; this time having no one to turn to.

The last month of summer was immensely slow, neither of the boys talking to each other. Isaac fought himself everyday, wanting to text Jackson, but remembering the situation, and refraining.

So, Isaac spent a month alone. He didn't have Jackson to get away, he had to suck it up and be tough, be stronger than he had been. In someways, Jackson was weakening him. Isaac had been confident he would always have Jackson to fall back on, that Jackson would always be there for him, and that kept him from fighting against his father.

Sometimes, he wouldn't even try and block the blows; he knew the more fucked up he looked, the longer Jackson would fuss and take care of him. But the month of August, he slowly began to realise he no longer had that. He had to start defending himself again, he had to start blending back in, staying out of his father's life in anyway possible.

As the days neared September, Isaac got antsy. Surprisingly, the nerves weren't from starting high school, it was the fact that he could potentially be put in any of Jackson's classes. Then he would see the guy all day, every day. How would it be possible to avoid him then?

Isaac began to ease his mind into the idea that he may have to confront Jackson. He may have to admit those feelings were true, and risk losing him, it would be impossibly hard. Although they hadn't spoken in a month, Isaac had been confident they may still have a chance to turn it around, forget what was felt, try and be friends again. But Isaac knew Jackson would most certainly want to talk about it, it would be impossible not to.

He texted Erica, the only other person he actually ever talked to. Her parents had moved to New York, but she wanted to stay, so she had moved in with her cousin over the summer. Isaac hadn't ever met the guy, but Erica talked about him a lot, she seemed to like him and that was good enough for Isaac.

He sounded like an intense, confident guy, at least the way Erica had described him. Isaac hoped that maybe some of that confidence would rub off on Erica, god knows she needed it.

Isaac hadn't seen Erica since june, as she was staying with her parents for summer, and had just flown in to get ready for school and get settled in her new house.

Erica responded a few minutes later, saying hi.

**To Erica 4.18:**

**_So how is the new house?_**

**Received from Erica 4.21**

**_not so much a house as a loft, kinda weird but at least i'm staying here?_**

**To Erica 4.22**

**_Is Derek cool? That's your cousins name, right?_**

**Received from Erica 4.25**

**_definitely, he's taking me shopping tomorrow…_**

They continued texting for an hour, Isaac asking about the loft, Derek, and what she was buying, and Erica asking Isaac about his summer and Jackson. Isaac lied, pretending he was still hanging out with the guy and that all was good.

A month without Isaac was affecting Jackson greatly. He couldn't come to terms with what he had done. He had kissed Isaac, he had broken every single boundary they ever had. Isaac had run, he had made it clear that Jackson needed to leave him alone, so Jackson made sure to do just that.

This period without Isaac was different, it tore him up inside, it felt like his heart was being clawed at, like his body was breaking down. He found that the only way to sedate this pain was with alcohol. The numbness of the liquid became a drug, one he needed almost nightly. He silently thanked his parents for their large supply of liquor.

Danny had obviously noticed the change in Jackson's behaviour, in his attitude, in his general composition, Jackson blamed this on growing up. Danny knew it was bullshit, but he wasn't one to outwardly pry in Jackson's life.

Jackson moved the lacrosse stuff to the backyard again, just incase.

They practised almost every single day. Tryouts for the team were a week before school started, and Jackson needed to make the team.

He did of course, he tried out for the freshman team, but they put him on JV and he was ecstatic. Coach Finstock told him he ought to be on Varsity, but there was a rule about freshman on the Varsity team. Jackson shrugged it off, he wasn't going to initiate a rule change or anything, but Finstock seemed determined.

Danny also made JV as goalie, his favourite position. They celebrated at Jackson's house with a lot of candy, soda, and video games. Jackson was so invested in lacrosse, he almost forgot about Isaac. Almost.


	16. Chapter 16

Isaac texted Erica the morning of their first day.

**To Erica 6.28:**

**_I'm on the bus…meet in ten minutes at the front of the school?_**

**Received from Erica 6.30**

**_okay! ;)_**

Isaac smiled at the winky face, he hadn't yet seen Erica, but the emoticon was a blatant sign of confidence.

The bus pulled up to the front of the school five minutes later, Isaac got off and waited by the front of the school, nervously tapping his foot. There was a group of boys behind him almost double his size, they were cursing loudly and hitting on a group of girls trying to get inside. Isaac shook his head, watching the boys use terrible pick-up lines at the obviously uninterested girls.

He was distracted by a loud engine revving, and he turned his head. A shiny black Chevy Camaro pulled into the parking lot. Isaac wasn't really into cars, but even he had to admit it was a beautiful car, Jackson would have rushed straight up to it. No, no thinking about Jackson, it only made Isaac's stomach churn more violently.

He watched as the car parked, and the passenger door popped open. A skinny girl in heels and a leather jacket slipped out. Isaac narrowed his eyes as she turned around, pushing her long, blond hair over her shoulder.

The girl started walking in Isaac's direction, and as she came closer, Isaac's mouth fell open. It was Erica.

She was now within fifty feet of Isaac, and she flashed him the biggest grin he had ever seen. The giant teenagers at the door stopped what they were doing, falling silent. Isaac realised they were all turned towards Erica.

Isaac always knew Erica was pretty, but after her make-over, she was drop-dead gorgeous. He knew the boys behind him saw it too, one of them let out a low whistle.

Erica skipped forward and wrapped her arms around Isaac. Isaac tensed at the contact of their bodies, and Erica immediately pulled away. Isaac gave her a weak smile and an apologetic look. One of the boys behind Isaac decided to push his way in-between the pair.

"Looks like he's not that into you, sweetheart," he mocked, after seeing the obvious discomfort Isaac had experienced from the hug. Erica smiled sarcastically and held up her two middle fingers; Isaac stared wide-eyed with his mouth open.

They guy muttered something inaudible to Isaac and then pushed his way through Isaac, back to his spot in the gang of guys, who were now laughing loudly.

"The car? Make-up? Clothes? Shoes?" Isaac was bewildered.

"All Derek," Erica explained. "I'm so much better, Isaac! I haven't had a seizure in two months! He's really, really great." She seemed so confident and happy, Isaac decided not to bring up the rude gesture situation, he could live with it if it meant Erica would stay happy.

Erica began cheerfully recapping her holiday in New York, and then moved onto moving in with Derek. Isaac listened actively, not wanting to have to recap his holiday, as he wasn't sure how well he could lie about the events with Jackson.

They picked up their schedules from the Freshman area in the gym; they had maths and science together. Isaac knew Erica would most likely suggest finding Jackson, so they could also compare schedules. Sure enough, she did.

"He actually texted me saying he was going to be late this morning," he blatantly lied. Erica rose an eyebrow, Isaac just nodded.

"Did you hang out with Jackson a lot?" Isaac nodded, and then shook his head.

"Well, he went on holidays to…Florida, to visit his relatives." Isaac cursed himself for making the lie more elaborate.

"Okay…" Isaac knew Erica suspected something was going on, but she thankfully didn't bring it up.

They wondered the halls, trying to find their classrooms. They passed a couple of kids, when Erica did a turn around and pulled Isaac backwards. She pointed at a guy across the hall, he was lanky and was wildly throwing his hands about.

"Kinda cute?" She hissed in Isaac's ear, Isaac wondered when Erica had become interested in boys, it wasn't something he had really ever thought of.

"Not really my type," Isaac shrugged. Erica gave him an idiotic look.

"I wouldn't expect so?" She half laughed, but the statement became a question. Isaac cursed under his breath, that wasn't something guys were supposed to say. He didn't have any words to answer Erica with, thankfully Erica broke the silence, "Should I talk to him?" Before Isaac could answer, the bell rang. "Damn." Damn? Since when did Erica curse? She seemed to be a totally new person, and of course it was great she was happy, but it seemed a little much.

They said goodbye and split to their classes in opposite directions.

—-

Jackson grinned ear to ear as he stepped through the front doors of Beacon Hills High. Danny followed closely behind him, smiling a little but he was obviously nervous. Jackson slapped Danny on the back.

"We made it! High School!" Jackson was a little too excited. Danny chuckled nervously. "Okay, step one: Make it on the Lacrosse team, check. Step two: Find a girl, in progress. Come on Danny, help me scour!"

"I don't think that work means what you think it does.." Jackson shook his head at his friend.

"I doesn't matter, dude!" Jackson walked backwards through the halls, facing Danny and trying to pump him up for the coming year. Suddenly, Jackson collided with something and fell to the ground.

"What the hell?" He turned around only to be face to face with some id he had never seen before, obviously a freshman.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to- I'm really clumsy, my bad. Let me just -" Jackson stared in amusement at the kid and realised he was pointing at a piece of paper that was under Jackson's shoe. He stepped back to let the kid retrieve the paper. The boy bent down to grab the paper and almost toppled over back into Jackson by the weight of his backpack. Jackson looked at Danny and raised an eyebrow, Danny shook his head and chuckled.

"Stiles!" The kid yelled, grinning at Jackson.

"Uh, bless you?" Jackson didn't know what the kid was trying to say.

"No, my name! Stiles Stilinski! That's my name!" He held out his hand. Jackson just looked at it until he dropped it to his side. "What's your name?"

"Um, Jackson…We actually have to go. Come on Danny."

"Oh no way! The Jackson who made it to the junior varsity team? Sweet! I kind of play, well I'm not very good, and I'm not on the team but I want to be!" Jackson turned around and gave him a stern look that read, 'go away, now,' and then continued walking in the other direction. Stiles stayed put this time. "No that's cool! I have to go the other way so, you know! See you later!"

"What the hell was that kid?" Jackson shook his head.

"He was a little strange," Danny laughed in response.

"Alright, back to work! Hottest girl in the school!" Jackson commanded. "I'll take outside, you take the halls, okay?" Danny nodded. The split from each other and Jackson walked to the courtyard where kids were swapping schedules and chatting about the upcoming school year. Jackson noticed a couple of decent looking girls, but none that particularly caught his eye.

As he glanced at all the new faces of his fellow classmates, he couldn't help but let his mind wander to a particular blond haired, blue eyed boy. No, Jackson thought. He wasn't going to go there. He and Isaac were done with each other, it needed to stay that way. Jackson was pulled out of his thoughts by Danny pulling on his arm.

"I thought you were doing the halls?" Jackson questioned.

"I was! I found this girl — she's beautiful! Seriously!"

"Well, take me to her!" Danny pulled Jackson into the building and through three different hallways before stopping against a row of lockers. "Where?" Jackson asked, hastily looking at the people is his general vicinity. He was about to get annoyed with Danny when he saw the prettiest girl he had ever laid eyes on. She had beautiful shining red hair, and flawless skin. Jackson slapped Danny on the back and pointed to her. Danny nodded.

"She's perfect! Step two, check!" Jackson was just about to make his move when he saw the same kid from before stumble down the hall and land right next to the girl. What the hell? Danny seemed to have noticed as well and shot Jackson a confused glance.

They watched the scene unfold. The girl dumped her handful of books in his arms as he jabbered on about something incoherent. She shot him a fake smile and started walking down the hall, the strange kid followed closely behind, struggling with his over weight backpack and the four textbooks in his clutches. Jackson and Danny followed the pair down the hall, maintaining a safe distance.

"How is _he_ with a girl like _that_?" Jackson demanded, glaring at the boy across the hall.

"Hey we don't know that he's with her, per say.." Jackson shot Danny a menacing glance before storming across the hall towards the couple they were watching.

Jackson placed his hand on the locker between the girl and the boy, turning his back on the latter. The girl looked him up and down, and smiled slightly, biting her bottom lip.

"Yes?" Jackson smiled.

"Why are you with a loser like _him_?" Jackson glared back at Stiles. The girl laughed.

"I'm not _with_ him, he's like a pet." Jackson scoffed and looked at the boy in question, he didn't seem offended, maybe it was a joke?

"So you're saying you're available?" Jackson grinned, moving his face closer.

"You don't even now my name," she smiled. Jackson rose an eyebrow. "Lydia."

"Hot," Jackson half-hissed. She smiled and let out a small laugh. "Jackson."

"Jackson, you're very bold, you know that?" Jackson shrugged, leaning more against the locker. Jackson pulled his phone out of his pocket and held it out to Lydia.

"Put your number it?" She happily took the phone, a number. Jackson gave her a quizzical look when her own phone ran from her bag.

"Now I have yours and you have mine," she explained. Jackson smiled, it was actually quite clever.

The bell rang and Lydia waved goodbye, walking off with Stiles closely in tow. Danny raised his eyebrows.

"What were the chances she's also into you?"

"There were very good odds, Danny. You underestimate the power of my face." Danny laughed, pushing Jackson down the hall.

—-

Erica caught him again at lunch, she tried to loop her arm with Isaac's, but he pulled away instinctively.

"I think you need a girlfriend," she proclaimed, eying the girls standing in the hallway. Isaac shook his head weakly, he really didn't want a girlfriend, he was still trying to figure out things with Jackson — if there was still anything to figure out. "It's not a question, it's a fact." Isaac reluctantly followed Erica through the school as she pointed out girls to him.

"Erica, we're wasting our whole lunch period, can you give up already?" Erica ignored him, pointing to another girl. Isaac followed her line of sight and shrugged. The girl was pretty, she was wearing a tight jacket, like Erica's, and heels. Isaac could just tell she would be popular.

"Ask her out." Isaac's eyes went wide, and he stared at Erica. "It's not hard," she laughed. Isaac shifted the weight of his backpack over to the other shoulder, and he stepped slightly forward. "Go!" Erica nudged him and he slightly stumbled forward.

He approached the girl and cleared his throat. She, in return, flipped her strawberry-blond hair over her shoulder, and raised an eyebrow.

Isaac rubbed the back of his neck, staring at the floor. "Do you," he cleared his throat again, 'Want to, uh, go out sometime?" The girl laughed — actually laughed in his face.

"Seriously?" the words hit Isaac like a tonne of bricks. He wasn't expecting a yes, but her tone was cruel. "Call me when your bicycle gets a real engine. What are you, thirteen?" She tossed her hair and strutted off, leaving Isaac in the middle of the hallway.

Erica ran up to him. "That was just harsh. Sorry, Isaac." Isaac shrugged, trying to keep his pain internal. The first time he had ever asked _anyone_ out, and he had been laughed at.


	17. Chapter 17

_A/N: Umm, somehow this entire chapter got deleted? Please read this, it's supposed to go before Isaac's birthday. I am so sorry._

* * *

Isaac got to his classes as early as he could, making sure to get a seat in the front row. High school was all about grades, as was his father, and he needed all A's.

His heart skipped a beat when he entered algebra because, ten feet away, Jackson sat sideways in his desk laughing with some guys. Isaac was stuck in the doorway, he didn't know what to do. Was he supposed to ignore the guy or acknowledge him? And if he was going to acknowledge him, how was he supposed to do that? With a head nod or a wave? Maybe he should use words? He was thrown from his thoughts by a body crashing into him from behind. The guy cursed and muttered about Isaac taking up the whole entry. Isaac ducked his head, rubbing the back of his neck and sliding into the desk closest to the door.

He sat low in his seat, sneaking sideways glances at Jackson, who still hadn't seemed to notice him. The bell rang and kids scrambled to find a desk as a man entered the classroom.

Their teacher, Mr Adams, went on a long spiel about how math was starting to get more serious and grades counted for more, Isaac listened attentively, but he couldn't help zoning out every now and then to turn around and check on Jackson. He didn't know what he was hoping for, really. It wasn't like their eyes would lock and Jackson would smile at him and they would make up and everything would be perfect, because Isaac had screwed up any chance of that.

Their eyes did meet though, only for a second. Isaac turned back once again, only to see Jackson was already looking at him. There was an awkward second of hopefulness until Jackson jerked his head away, staring down at his desk. Isaac cursed himself for making up stupid fantasies and letting himself think for even a second that Jackson wanted him. Jackson hated him, that much was clear.

The hour long class period went by way too slowly after that. Isaac was out of his seat and in the hall before the dismissal bell had stopped ringing. He didn't bother to look back at Jackson one more time, he made a beeline straight to his chemistry classroom.

Erica grinned and waved at him from one of the tables, he gave a weak smile back and fell into the seat next to her.

"I found out that guy from the halls name, it's Stiles, kinda weird? Well he's in my English class and I tried talking to him but he didn't really seem all that in to me…I mean maybe he couldn't hear me because he was talking to some other guy…what do you think?" Isaac had only been paying attention to half the words, he shrugged. Erica obviously didn't notice Isaac was out of it, and Isaac was both thankful and a little irritated at that. Erica seemed to be enjoying high school so far, which was great for her, but Isaac thought it was a bit of a let down. All the classes were pretty much the same as last year except instead of teachers telling you you're preparing for high school, it was preparing for college.

He tuned back into Erica, who was now planning a fictional date with Stiles. Isaac couldn't help but let his mind wander over to Jackson, replacing Erica with himself and Stiles with Jackson, as he listened to the elaborate date. He caught himself much later than he should have and forcefully thought about anything else.

Thankfully chemistry class started and Isaac was able to have a distraction. He diligently wrote notes on class breakdown, although no one else in the class seemed to be paying attention. He learned later this was because they would receive a class syllabus with all the information on it anyway, the extra work didn't annoy him however, because he hadn't thought of Jackson in almost an hour.

Chemistry was the last class of the day. Erica and Isaac left class together and walked down the hall to the bus line. Isaac noticed a few guys were staring at him, no doubly wondering why a girl like Erica was hanging out with a guy like him.

They made it all the way to the busses without running into Jackson. It had only just occurred to Isaac what may happen if Erica saw Jackson. She could possibly call out to him, making an awkward situation worse. Isaac prayed that Jackson ignoring her all of middle school may keep her from doing so.

Another problem with graduating to high school was the campus. Isaac was now living far enough away where it was almost impossible to walk home. Sure, he still could, but it would take him until night fall. This would be a huge issue if Jackson hadn't made it on the lacrosse team, but he had, which meant he would have practise after school and wouldn't be joining Isaac on the bus ride.

He and Erica parted ways, as Erica now had Derek's Camaro to take her home.

—-

Jackson mentally cursed and ruined himself after locking eyes with Isaac today. He was an idiot, he knew he shouldn't have been staring, but he couldn't help himself. Isaac had caught him and was still obviously not okay with what had happened. Jackson knew he should probably say something, anything, but he wouldn't. He was moving on with that part of his life. He liked girls, he was into Lydia, of course he was.

He had lacrosse after school, but he texted Lydia as soon as practise ended. Nothing serious, just a simple, 'What's up?'. He grabbed the rum from the liquor shelf and mixed it with some coke. He had been cutting alcohol from his diet in favour of lacrosse, but after today he was in dire need of it.

Lydia responded with a simple text about homework and Jackson decided to ask about the kid that followed her around. He learned that Lydia wasn't really friends with him at all, but they had gone to the same school since elementary and he would always offer to do tasks for her and she wouldn't object, but simply let him do what he wanted.

Lydia started to make her texts more flirty, adding wink emoticons to most responses, Jackson reciprocated this by sending smilies back. He wasn't sure how in to Lydia he actually was, he still couldn't get Isaac out of his mind. He took a long sip and shook his head. Of course he was into her, he had to be. Worst comes to worse, he could use her as a front. Another sip.

Seeing Isaac in school everyday was far worse than Jackson had anticipated and he realised he was slowly falling back into his post-kiss habits. He had had a drink after practise every day that first week. Every time the blond boy popped into his mind he felt the need to numb the pain, loosen his brain.

Lydia started to help a bit, not with the drinking, but with forgetting about Isaac. They had their first kiss only a week after they swapped numbers.

Lydia had decided to watch friday afternoon practise and as Jackson emerged from the locker room she had pulled him into a corner, pushing herself up against him. Her lips brushed up against his, which took him slightly by surprise. She pressed closer, the kiss becoming more desperate, he responded with enthusiasm, because damn he was a teenage boy and a kiss was something. He held her tightly around the waist, trying to get their bodies as close as possible. Lydia chuckled, slightly pulling away.

"You're very eager."

"Shut up," he responded, closing the gab between them once more. They made out for a few minutes before Lydia broke the kiss, explaining that her mom was waiting.

Jackson got home and drank more than he had in the past week combined, because that had been his first kiss since Isaac, and that's all he could think about.

This kiss was fantastic, making out had been great, but through the whole five minute experience, he had imagined he was kissing Isaac. It hadn't even registered in his brain until Lydia was running off, it was like he had slipped into a trance. His brain was broken, he wasn't functioning properly. When a guy is making out with a girl they aren't supposed to imagine it's another guy they're with, that was absolutely not okay.

Lydia was perfect, and it had been she he was kissing, so why couldn't it be Lydia he thought of an not Isaac? He drank until he passed out.

The third week of school was better, he and Lydia had 'officially' started dating (official meaning she had put it as her Facebook status). She went to all of his practises and they started getting more intimate, something Jackson was physically ready for but definitely not emotionally.

When Lydia guided Jackson's hands up her shirt, he froze. His brain shut down because he was not sure he wanted this at all, in fact he was sure he didn't want it once it had happened. It was 98% the fact that he had no idea what to do with his hands at this point and 2% the fact that it definitely felt weird.

Lydia hadn't noticed because her hands were now drifting far south, tracing the band of Jackson's pants. By some miracle, Jackson's phone went off. He sprung back from Lydia's grasp and fumbled with the answer button.

She frowned when he hung up and explained that his mom was here to pick him up.

"I can take you home later, can't you stay a bit?" Jackson shook his head probably too quickly in response.

"I actually have to go home now, relatives are over," he lied, "I'll text you later!" With that, he sprinted back to the main building. He made his way towards his locker to retrieve his school bag, but as he turned the corner, he froze in his tracks. Isaac was sitting on the floor barely ten feet away, next to him, a skinny blond girl wearing clothes way too tight for anyone's own good. He shuffled back behind the wall, keeping his eyes on the couple.

Isaac was leaning over a book, speaking too softly for Jackson to understand. The girl was leaning over him, her boobs almost pressed up against his back, the sight send a pang through Jackson's body. She had a smile on her face and was constantly playing with her long hair, Jackson's nails dug into his palms.

He realised, however, that this is exactly what was going to happen. He knew Isaac didn't reciprocate his feelings towards him, he knew Isaac would end up in some kind of relationship. Of course he knew these things, but he had never considered it happening so soon. He had imagined it being far in the future, once he was totally invested in Lydia and seeing Isaac in class didn't faze him one bit.

This was far too soon, he just wasn't into Lydia like he should have been, that much he could willingly admit, and he was definitely not over Isaac. He was about to turn and forget retrieving his bag when a movement caught him off guard.

The girl had pushed herself further into Isaac, and Isaac had jerked away. He realised this was probably nothing, it was just Isaac's general reaction to anyone touching him, but if this girl was his girlfriend, shouldn't he be passed that? Once again he beat himself up with theories. He was lost in his mind when it happened again, only bigger.

She had moved closer again, but Isaac made an elaborate show of moving away, scooting almost a foot to the right of her. She fell back down onto her butt, looking like she was admitting defeat. Jackson grinned slightly, immediately cursing himself for it. This didn't prove anything other than he wasn't dating this girl, but he could be dating someone else, and this definitely didn't reveal anything about Isaac's feelings towards Jackson.

Jackson decided to leave his bag behind, his mom drove him home and he collapsed on the bed, once again drinking himself into a void of numbness.

—

Isaac was confused. Erica had been talking non-stop about Stiles for the past two weeks, but she seemed to be pushing herself at Isaac. Isaac assumed his mind was making things up, that he was in some way confused about Erica's feelings towards him, he was sure her intentions were totally platonic.

The first two weeks had been brutal, seeing Jackson everyday had really put a toll on him, but the third week was the shittiest. He had been walking from second period to third when Erica had grabbed him the shoulders and spun him around. Reflexively he shoved her off, yelping in surprise. He ended up turning the opposite way Erica had been aiming for and immediately realised why she had tried to turn him around so spontaneously. Jackson was directly down the hall, his arm wrapped around a girl with strawberry-blond hair, the same girl Isaac had been laughed at three weeks earlier.

He heard Erica sigh behind him.

"I thought he was your friend, what the hell?" Jackson turned to face her, but avoided eye contact. "Isaac?"

"We don't really talk anymore," he admitted.

"But dating her? That is not okay!" Isaac shrugged, trying to keep his feelings at bay.

"It's fine, really." Erica shook her head, but dropped the subject.

Isaac cried when he got home, something he had been refraining from. He had refused to cry over Jackson but this was too much to handle. All of his feelings had come in a wave and once he started, he couldn't stop.

There were now five days left until his birthday, and he know knew his secret hope of everything reverting to perfect would not happen. Jackson was with the prettiest girl in the grade, he had forgotten all about Isaac.

He and Erica stayed after school the next day in attempt to get a head start on their chemistry project. Just like before, Erica was pressing herself close to Isaac, almost like a cat would against its owner.

Erica was working on the second question, while Isaac tackled the first. He finished quickly and waited for Erica, he looked up, scanning the halls for something to focus on. He was glancing over to the left end when a body came into view. He noticed the boy right away, Jackson. His head snapped down to his work.

"Um, so did you get number 2 yet?" He kept his eyes down at the paper, but he would still see Jackson out of his peripheral vision. Erica let out a frustrated sigh, readjusting her position so she was now leaning against Isaac, he squirmed a bit at the touch. Jackson had now back behind the wall slightly, making it harder to see him. He looked up at Erica, making it easier to see Jackson.

Was it his imagination or were Jackson's fists shaking? His face, even from a distance, looked almost enraged. Erica moved against Isaac and Isaac jerked, Jackson's face softened. The surprise in Isaac's face surely almost gave him away, had that been a coincidence? They were the only two people in the hall, he knew Jackson was watching them.

Luckily, Erica had tried moving closer, Isaac made a show of moving away this time, scooting well away from her. Jackson's fists unclenched, his face slackened and Isaac looked down, smiling to himself, because this was definitely something. Screw Lydia because Isaac knew what jealousy was and that was definitely it.


	18. Chapter 18

_A/N: This was previously chapter 17, I have no idea why.._

It was the 22nd of September. Jackson woke up at five, he swigged from his bottle of whiskey because he knew today was going to suck. If it took half of his brain power to forget about Isaac on a regular day, it was going to take ten times that to forget about him on his birthday, and you can't reach that without a little liquid courage.

Lydia practically groped him in the hallway as soon as he was in arms reach, which was an okay way to start a knowingly shitty day. In all honesty, it wasn't a shitty day, but Jackson just couldn't seem to enjoy it. Isaac was in algebra of course, he seemed more sluggish than normal. Jackson took the sports bus home from lacrosse, as his dad was in London and his mom was out, again.

He collapsed when he got home, something he was doing way too often. He considered calling Danny, inviting him over for the night, they hadn't hang out outside of school and lacrosse in a while and Jackson knew that was his own fault.

His finger was on the dial button when there was a knock on the door. He sighed, dropping the phone and pulling himself up from the bed.

Jackson pulled the door open violently, surprised to see Isaac standing behind it. He looked faint, his eyes were red, and his breathing shaky. Jackson opened his mouth to speak, but he didn't know what to say. They stared in silence, Jackson in shock, Isaac in deep thought.

Suddenly, Isaac shot forward, his lips colliding with Jackson's, it was sloppy and Jackson moved into him to keep him up, but before he could do anything else, Isaac pulled away and stumbled backwards over the threshold. He caught himself on the door frame. Jackson lurched forward to steady him, and Isaac welcomed the help. Jackson cleared his throat and looked into Isaac's eyes.

"Um, happy birthday?" Isaac gave a weak smile. Jackson knew it wasn't the best response to a kiss, but it's the only thing that would come out.

"I'm sorry, crap, I shouldn't have…" Isaac muttered, collapsing into Jackson's shoulder. Jackson shook his head.

"Don't apologise, I—" Isaac dug his face into Jackson's collar bone and he was at a loss for words. They stood like that until Jackson realised they were still halfway outside, and it was still daylight. He lightly pushed Isaac away, looking into his eyes to let him know he wasn't going anywhere.

Jackson closed the door, grabbed Isaac's hand, and led him upstairs. They sat down on Jackson's bed.

"What was that…I mean it was great but…" Jackson wasn't sure what to say, it was the strangest situation he had ever been in and he wasn't sure what had even just happened. Isaac still had tears streaming down his face.

"I knew you were—I saw you watching me with Erica," Isaac started. That was Erica? Jackson mentally kicked himself. "You were jealous and I don't understand, why would you be jealous?"

"I, uh," Jackson was doing terribly at the word game.

"You're with Lydia! You hate me, I mean—I don't know!" Isaac was crying again and Jackson wanted to wrap his arms around the boy, he hadn't considered Isaac would be hurting like this. Did he say hate?

"Hate you? Isaac why would I hate you, I kissed you! You were the one who ran out, I messed it up," Jackson was confused beyond reason.

"I thought you—I thought you did it to make fun of me because you knew…"

"Knew?" Jackson questioned.

"I think, um, can you tell me why you uh—you know?" Isaac was still stumbling over tears, he looked down at his hands.

"Okay," Jackson agreed, deciding to just get everything out in the open. "I started having - thoughts, I guess." He looked at Isaac, who was looking at his hands, but obviously listening. "It's weird because, Danny _knows_ he likes guys, but I can't—couldn't—figure it out. It was after that Christmas you spent with me…" Jackson looked to Isaac, hoping he was understanding the nonsense Jackson was spitting out, Isaac refused to look up. "I liked you in a weird way, to a point that it started freaking me out. I know that night you just needed me to comfort you, and I fucked up. My head was foggy, all I could think about was you pressed against me, I lost control." Isaac was almost as red in the face as Jackson was, it was obviously just as awkward for Isaac. "I never texted you…I thought you hated me…I just wanted to get you off my mind, I thought you were trying to forget about me." He trailed off, and Isaac took over.

"I guess I was feeling the same, maybe. When I was twelve, and you fixed my shoulder? You held onto my hand after, I got his weird feeling in my stomach. It happened a lot, after I saw you in the hall, every time you touched me…" Isaac faded out, fidgeting with his hands, Jackson waited for him to continue. "I freaked out when— uh, in the summer," he blatantly avoided the word 'kiss'. "I was mad. I was upset, I wanted you to calm me down, like you always did. I didn't expect— I was confused, shocked, I thought maybe you knew and were trying to get me to admit it." Jackson cocked his head.

"Knew what?" Isaac's eyes shot up.

"Nothing, never mind," he looked alarmed, but Jackson decided to leave it for the time being. "I waited for you to text me, I thought I had messed up, I ran away, I thought you would be mad at me, I thought you would hate me if we talked… I tried to ignore you, I did, but then I saw you when I was with Erica and I knew you didn't know…" Isaac realised he was rambling.

"Isaac, this discussion isn't going to get any easier, you need to be more specific." Isaac nodded.

"I knew I liked you…more than the friend way. I knew before you," he made a gesture of some sort, "And I knew after, it took me awhile, but I do…like you?" Jackson was smiling, Isaac was stuttering over his words, and it was adorable. Wait, was he allowed to think that now?

"So, are we okay?" Isaac nodded. "Okay, good. Why did you kiss me at the door?" Isaac was stunned with Jackson's bluntness of the question. "Was it to confirm? To apologise? To prove a point? I don't understand."

"Because you were jealous… I knew that meant something and I didn't, uh, I couldn't really ask." Jackson smiled again, this conversation was going better than he had even hoped. Isaac's eyes were closed, and he was breathing deeply. "Can I do it again?" He opened one eye to peek at Jackson, who was nodding slowly.

Isaac leaned forward, his lips meeting Jackson's. Jackson pressed further, bringing his hands behind Isaac's shoulders to draw him in. Isaac deepened the kiss, slightly parting his lips. Jackson followed, moving his lips against Isaac, and pushing him down. Isaac pulled away instinctively, pushing Jackson in the opposite direction. Jackson made a sound of protest in his throat, before realising Isaac was hyperventilating.

"Isaac?" Jackson moved back towards the boy, but kept a little distance. Isaac pulled himself up, looking sad.

"I'm sorry, I felt like I was…stuck," he admitted, lowering his head. Jackson pulled his chin up.

"Don't apologise, alright?" Isaac nodded. Jackson moved away, sighing. "I'll break up with Lydia tomorrow."

"What? No!" Isaac looked alarmed, which confused Jackson.

"What do you mean, 'no'? I'm cheating on her."

"No you're not! We're not— It's not cheating, we're friends." Jackson raised an eyebrow.

"Friends?" He repeated. Isaac stuttered, trying to think of something to say. "Why don't you want me to break up with her?"

"People will find out," he muttered monotonously.

"If I break up with my fifteen-year-old girlfriend, everyone will assume I'm gay and dating you? Makes sense," Jackson's voice was spiteful, and Isaac flinched.

"That's not what I meant!"

"What do you mean?" Jackson pinched the bridge of his nose and took a deep breath.

"I don't know," Isaac admitted. "It's just, I can't do— all that stuff. You like Lydia, you should get to be with her, it's fair." Jackson shook his head, disagreeing before words left Isaac's mouth.

"Do what stuff, Isaac? I shouldn't get to be with her, I like _you_."

"I have my issues, I can't be crowded, I can't feel trapped…I'm not comfortable with the things you want, you saw just then, I can't handle it well," he explained hastily.

"Things I want? I want _you_, that's all." Isaac looked sad and he shook his head.

"Can you just stay with Lydia for a bit? Please?" Jackson unwillingly complied, only because Isaac was incredibly hard to say no to when he was begging. Isaac nodded, thanking him silently.

"We can still— I don't even know what we are…" Jackson trailed off, cocking his head at Isaac.

"Friends," Isaac answered simply.

"With benefits?" Isaac made an annoyed face. "Okay, no?" He shrugged. "Do you want to- be with me? What does that even mean?"

"I don't know," Isaac shrugged, looking at his feet. "I do— want to be with you, that is. I liked…"

"Kissing me?" Isaac swallowed and nodded.

"I like when you— comfort me. I don't want to be crying all the time when you do, though." Isaac was red in the face, Jackson knew Isaac had trouble admitting things. He guessed Isaac just wanted to be close to him.

"Good, as cute as you are when you're crying—"

"What?" Isaac cut him off. "Did you just call me cute?" Now it was Jackson's turn to blush red.

"Sorry, slipped out." Isaac smiled.

"It's fine, I may…uh, really like your abs." Jackson chuckled.

"And I thought I had to look out for Danny, but truthfully, I was sorta-kinda trying to show 'em off?" Isaac grinned at the floor, he was right. "Any more confessions?" Isaac thought for a moment, there were a few, but he preferred not to share those ones. He shook his head. "I don't believe you, but alright," he flashed a smile at Isaac, who returned one.

"Why did you get with Lydia?" Isaac was solemn again. Jackson sighed, letting out a shaky breath.

"I wanted a girlfriend, I needed to prove to myself that I didn't need you—which I do— I saw her, she's beautiful…I just…It was like when you want to like something, so you keep doing it, hoping you'll like it eventually, but you really never do." Isaac nodded, eyes still at the ground. "I like her fine, I mean, she's just not you." Isaac smiled dumbly at the compliment. "Why do you want me to stay with her, seriously?"

"I get overwhelmed from a _kiss_, Jackson. I just want you to stay with her for a bit, just to see what it's like, having to deal with me. I freak out when people touch me, what do you think I would do in a more…sexual environment?" Jackson sighed and closed his eyes.

"Isaac, I just want you to— I don't need anything from you, okay?" Jackson didn't understand what Isaac's problem was with understanding how he felt.

"But you will! You're a teenage boy, Jackson. You'd get so frustrated with me, I know." Jackson gave him a look of confusion. "Just, how many times a week do you masturbate?" Jackson's eyes grew wide and he scoffed.

"What?" He started laughing, he couldn't believe Isaac had just blurted that out. He looked at Isaac, who was definitely not laughing. The kid was strange. "You're serious?" Isaac just stared at the ground. "I dunno, every other day? Every day maybe…" Jackson couldn't believe they were actually having this conversation. Isaac threw out his hands like Jackson had just answered all of their problems.

"See?" Jackson was confused beyond reason, he definitely did not 'see'.

"I'm honestly not seeing your point here, Isaac. How is the fact that I jerk off proving anything? Or did you just want to know?" Jackson grinned and Isaac made a frustrated noise, Jackson decided to keep his mouth shut, obviously Isaac was taking this seriously.

"Just bear with me as I try and explain it, okay? When you were with me, and you were just pressed against me and you got urges, you wanted to kiss me…now imagine getting urges while you're kissing me, they're going to be ten times worse, and I can't handle that, and I can't lead you on like that." Jackson let out the most dramatic sign.

"I already told you, I don't care, alright? I can control myself, I'm fifteen, not rabid. I'll stay with Lydia for a bit, fine, but I'm with _you _now, and that's what I want. I want you, not a body to grope, got it?" Jackson realised he was being a bit harsh in his tone, but Isaac needed to understand that if it was the only thing he ever understood. He wished Isaac wasn't so flighty with touch, but it was something he could deal with, just being friends with Isaac as aesthetic.

Isaac nodded and leaned against Jackson's shoulder, closing his eyes.


	19. Chapter 19

_A/N: This is the new chapter, you may want to go back and re-read 17 and 18, as 18 is what was previously 17, because 17 went missing or something...I'm sorry if that's confusing, bear with_ me

After a night of awkward confessions and a few tears, the world suddenly seemed to light up. Isaac was out of his weird funk and not only was Jackson his friend again, but they had the something more he had unknowingly craved for so long.

It was weird though, Isaac could admit that much. He wasn't sure what to call what they had together because it seemed to be more than a friendship, of course it was more than a friendship, they had kissed. But it wasn't a relationship, at least not one similar to those Isaac was familiar with, which was really only kids groping each other in the hallways, he and Jackson obviously didn't do that.

Even if he couldn't put a label on it, he was still happy with whatever it was. Jackson had him over whenever he could, but they were still on a weird level of friendship at school. Of course, there was still the issue of Lydia. Isaac had yet to tell Jackson of his dating attempt with her the first day of school and he doubted he would ever bring it up, it was embarrassing, yes, but it also didn't seem relevant. He had made Jackson stay with Lydia for the purpose of a front, but now it seemed almost useless, and seeing Jackson and Lydia act like a couple made Isaac sick, he hadn't realised it would hurt so much.

It was like a churning started in his stomach when he saw them interact and when they made contact with each other it was as if he were being stabbed. He hated it and with that, he stated to hate her.

Every day before algebra he would pass by the two, Jackson's arm draped around her, they would be smiling or laughing and Isaac wondered if Jackson even thought about him during the time he spent with Lydia. He'd feel like shit for a minute or two as he settled down into his desk, but as soon as Jackson entered the room, girlfriend free and winking at Isaac as he passed, he completely forgot about the bad feelings. Jackson was into him and he made sure he knew that.

He'd constantly sneak glances back at Jackson, who would always be looking straight back. They would lock eyes and instead of both snapping their heads in opposite directions, Jackson would smile or wink and Isaac would blush.

They didn't sit together at lunch of course, that time was reserved for Danny and Isaac respected that, he had Erica anyway. What pissed him off, however, was the fact that the time for Danny had slowly merged with Lydia and it became a group of them laughing and eating together. Jackson was becoming popular and Isaac wasn't, it was predictable of course, but he couldn't help but wonder if he would be popular if Jackson just acknowledged them as friends.

All of those feelings were cancelled out however by the fact that Jackson liked him. They texted all the time, and it was much less platonic than before, many more smiley and winky faces, but nothing compared to being with him.

Jackson wanted it, it was Isaac that couldn't handle the touching. He wanted to be able to so badly but it was as if every fibre in his body rejected it. He was fine with the small gestures, Jackson would link his foot with Isaac's when they were sitting on the bus together, he would set his arm around Isaac's shoulders when they were watching a movie, it was something Isaac loved, and something he could deal with. Sometimes, it went too far.

They watched a lot of movies, obviously not for their love of movies, but because it was a way for them to test their limits. They would start out sitting a few inches apart, Jackson would slowly move closer, eventually hooking his angle with Isaac's and placing his arm out above the couch. His arm would then slide down to Isaac's shoulders, the first few times he flinched, but after the third time he was expecting it. From that point, it got a little more difficult. Jackson tried to pull Isaac into his body the first time, which resulted in them sitting a foot apart for the rest of the movie after Isaac jerked away. The second attempt, Jackson tried to slip his hand lower, around Isaac's waist, but Isaac ended up kicking him in the shin as an impulsive reflex. Jackson moved away and Isaac was too embarrassed to say anything so, once again, they ended up apart. After a couple more attempts, Jackson got fed up.

"We need to figure this out, alright?" Jackson said right before they started Inception. It caught Isaac off guard and he just shot Jackson a confused look. "The whole you pulling away from me thing." Isaac looked down at his feet as Jackson continued. "I know it's because of the reflex thing but it never seems to happen when you're upset, you hold on to me with your life during those moments. You trust me, right?"

"It's not my fault, I mean it is but I can't help it."

"Yeah, but look," Jackson stepped forward and grabbed Isaac's shoulders, "You didn't flinch," he commented.

"Because it wasn't…" Jackson raised his eyebrows. "Awkward. It's weird, I don't know what I'm supposed to do and it makes me freak out." Jackson let out a frustrated sigh and fell backwards onto the couch.

"Just stop thinking about it!"

"How can I stop thinking about it when you're right there? All I can think about is you, how you smell, how I can feel you next to me, how I can hear you breathing, how can I just not think about that?"

"I don't know!" Jackson stopped himself and took a deep breath. "I don't know. Let's just start the movie."

Ten minutes into the movie and Jackson still hadn't moved, twenty and he pressed pause on the remote. "Now it's awkward for me to do anything." He threw his head back against the couch and Isaac almost laughed. "Can we just kiss or something?" He spoke up to the ceiling but Isaac assumed he wanted an answer.

"We can," he replied. Jackson's head shot back up and he raised an eyebrow.

"We don't have to, I was just annoyed." Isaac shrugged.

"It might help." Jackson gave him a smirk which really meant, 'no it wouldn't but now I know you want to.' Jackson leaned forward and lightly pressed his lips against Isaac's, he pulled away after a second, Isaac frowned. Jackson frowned upon seeing Isaac's frown.

"What did I do?"

"Nothing, I just thought it would last longer," Isaac admitted. Jackson gave him another smirk and pressed play on the movie, hooking their ankles and moving in closer.

—-

It all got easier from that point, they had moved on from awkward hover hands to kissing for a good minute at some points. Of course Isaac still had impulses to push Jackson away, but he bit them back because this was so much better.

Seeing Jackson with Lydia wasn't as hard anymore, now knowing that he was getting the better end of the deal. Spending the whole afternoon watching movies and kissing Jackson had to beat spending a few seconds in the hall with him during school.

—

Although kissing Isaac for a few seconds was blissful, Jackson wanted so much more. He had to force himself to back away, he had to count in his head to keep from being carried away, he had to fuel his urges with Lydia. That's how he ended up in an empty classroom, pants halfway off, and Lydia straddling him during 2nd period.

Kissing Lydia wasn't nearly as euphoric as kissing Isaac, but it sedated his needs. They hadn't broken contact in over ten minutes, and Lydia's hands were now slipping inside Jackson's pants, and she didn't stop them. He was barely hard and Lydia seemed to notice this, as she broke this kiss for a second, giving him a questioning look. Jackson ignored it and pulled her back down, forcing his lips back onto hers.

She palmed at him, and Jackson closed his eyes, trying to imagine it was Isaac, but it was all wrong. She felt wrong, her lips were wrong, her body was wrong, and Jackson couldn't shake the feeling that he was cheating. His mind went elsewhere and his body stopped craving for attention, it just wasn't worth it.

He pushed Lydia off him, who gave him a disgruntled look. "I'm just not that into it. I have to go to class." He slid off the desk and buttoned his pants back up before exiting the class room, leaving behind a very annoyed Lydia.

As he was making his way to his classroom, he ran into Danny, who rose his eye brows as soon as he saw Jackson's appearance.

"Shirt wrinkled, fly is down, hair is a mess, and you've got red lipstick on." Jackson cursed, rubbing at his lips. "Lydia?" Jackson murmured in response. "You should probably always check yourself in the mens room after hooking up with someone, trust me." Jackson rose his eyebrows at Danny, because who could Danny be hooking up with? Suddenly, he realised he hadn't had a proper conversation with his best friend in over a month.

"Saturday, you're coming over, alright?" Danny shrugged. "No shrugs, video game marathon." He smiled.

"Alright, you're on, be prepared to loose." Danny whacked his backpack as he passed, returning to his classroom.


End file.
